Episode 158: Trick or Treat? (Live from WBUR CitySpace)
/After years of doing Spirits, Julia is once again putting Amanda to the test to see what she’s learned. This time, Amanda must decide whether a mythological story ends in a Trick or a Treat with the help of our Witches Three: Eric Silver, Mike Schubert, and Brandon Grugle.
This week, Amanda recommends Over the Top by Jonathan Van Ness.
Content Warning: This episode contains conversations about drinking, witchcraft, religious persecution, infant death, theft, natural disasters, animal attacks, car accidents, childbirth complications, and fire/death.
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Transcript
Amanda: Welcome to Spirits Podcast, a boozy dive into mythology, legends and folklore. Every week we pour a drink and learn about a new story from around the world. I'm Amanda.
Julia: And I'm Julia.
Amanda: This is Episode 158, Trick or Treat, live from WBUR CitySpace.
Julia: It was so nice to be back in Boston, my college town, the home of my mistaken years.
Amanda: I think this is a really good example of why I'm so stoked to be a part of Multitude because we had a big meeting where we were all talking about things to do at the live show, like as our Multitude live segments, and this idea would never have occurred to any of us on our own. So I love that it started as a pun, and then it grew into a very fun segment that I hope all of you enjoy.
Julia: I'm hoping that we'll be able to do it again at other live shows. It was really nice to kind of test the waters, see what people thought of it. It was a blast. I hope you enjoyed yourself, Amanda, since you were the contestant in this situation.
Amanda: I did. I really enjoyed telling everybody else when to talk and when to let me opine. It felt great.
Julia: Correct, as you always should.
Amanda: Do you know what else just feels really right, Julia?
Julia: Our new patrons?
Amanda: Having our new patrons with us. Sutton, Alice, Alice, Alice, Allie and Leroy, Hailey, [Marrow 00:01:14], and Hannah, welcome.
Julia: Welcome. You join the ranks of our fantastic, phenomenal supporting Producer level patrons: Philip, Megan, Deborah, Molly, Skyla, Samantha, Sammie, Josey, Neil, Jessica, and Phil Fresh.
Amanda: Love it. You are also among the distinguished ranks of our Legend level patrons who every month get a physical gift in the mail from Julia, Eric and me: Kylie, Hannah, Kylo the Husky, Charlotte, Morgan, Emily, James, [Be on the 00:01:40] Up Scotty, Audra, Chris, Mark, Cody, Mr. Folk, Sarah, and Jack Marie.
Julia: That always makes me happy thinking about those names. I'm like, "Ah yes, my friends."
Amanda: My friends, who I send mail to every month. It's really sweet.
Julia: They're like pen pals but for the modern era.
Amanda: Julia, remind us on this blustery October day what we were drinking?
Julia: So shout-out to CitySpace because they bought us this incredible variety pack of Boston craft beers, which I was like, "Ah yes, my home, my sweet, sweet home." If you want to get a taste of my personal Bostonian college experiences, you have to try the Back Bay Basic. It is a classic from Stephanie's on Newbury Street, which I would always go to a little bit hungover when my parents were in town for brunch. The Back Bay Classic was vodka, St-Germain, lime juice, and then it was topped with Prosecco. So it's a really perfect, very strong boozy brunch cocktail.
Amanda: Julia, not for me, but for you, and that's all that matters.
Julia: That is true. I make you your Old Fashioneds and your Manhattans every now and again, but sometimes I just got to do me.
Amanda: The other day I had a Maker's Mark Old Fashioned, and I was just like, "This is everything I ever want when I want a whiskey drink. It's so perfect."
Julia: Sometimes you just find something that's so simple and so right, and you're just like, "This is it. This is it."
Amanda: Julia, do you know what else I enjoyed recently and just thought to myself, "This is so right"?
Julia: Tell me.
Amanda: It was Over the Top: A Raw Journey to Self-Love by Jonathan Van Ness.
Julia: Yes, tell me more.
Amanda: Jonathan from Queer Eye wrote a book, like a memoir, of his early life basically up to now, and it is so honest. The way he starts it out is by saying, "People see me in the street and they think that I am a bubbly, effervescent font of never-ending positivity, joy, love, just caring about people's hair, and that is not at all all of me." So from the perspective of having a career in public and figuring out how to be honest and how to show people, listen, you don't just pop out of the world being somebody that people look up to. You have to kind of earn that. It was wonderfully written. It was nice and short, so I read it in basically one sitting one evening. I think I might actually listen again to the audiobook because I would definitely love to hear a narrated version of the book because Johnathan's voice is just so strong in my head. So I highly recommend you check it out.
Julia: That sounds incredible. Also, if you haven't listened to Getting Curious with Johnathan Van Ness, also a great podcast.
Amanda: It's a good podcast, Julia. It's a great podcast. Very few celebrities have good podcasts, and this one is so good.
Julia: It is excellent. Definitely, definitely check it out.
Amanda: Finally this week we want to remind you that you can come see Spirits live in Austin in February just the day before my birthday, and we can all celebrate at midnight together after the show. That is at multitude.productions/live, but also we wanted to just have a little appeteaser here Julia, didn't we?
Julia: Oo, yes. Yes, Amanda, tell them.
Amanda: Because I don't know, if you live in the LA area, maybe keep your ears tuned. Maybe sign up for that newsletter on multitude.productions. If you live, I don't know, in Boston and you thought, "Dang, I, a) wish I could have gone to this live show we're listening to tonight, or b) went and it was so good and I want to relive it," I don't know, maybe there will be a new live show from Spirits coming into town sometime, I don't know, around when graduation happens.
Julia: I don't know. Who's to say?
Amanda: Who's to say?
Julia: Who's to say?
Amanda: We're very excited. We will have concrete news for you over the next few weeks, but the best place to get first news is at multitude.productions/live. Scroll down to the bottom, and you can sign up for our newsletter.
Julia: And Amanda writes an incredible newsletter.
Amanda: Thanks. All right, well without further ado, we sincerely hope you enjoy Episode 158: Trick Or Treat, live from WBUR CitySpace.
Julia: Hi, everyone. Welcome to Multitude Live!
Audience: Whoo!
Amanda: You knew all your applause cues. Very good. Good job.
Julia: [crosstalk 00:05:38].
Amanda: We are so excited to be here. We're so excited to be in Boston. We've never performed here before, and we can't wait to show you what we have in store tonight. But first, since we are in Boston and it's basically the same as Salem... That's what people keep saying. I don't know why. They think they're different towns.
Julia: That's what they said.
Amanda: We just wanted to open this Halloween season by repenting for our crimes. So would one of us please... Would you like to just take us through a couple of crimes-
Eric: I knew you were all witches before.
Julia: [crosstalk 00:06:06].
Amanda: [crosstalk 00:06:06], okay.
Eric: I've been a pilgrim this entire time. I love Jesus and everything that comes around with it and also cornflakes and abstaining from things.
Mike: I think we found someone, maybe?
Eric: Happy Yom Kippur.
Amanda: Yeah. In the spirit, let's just take us through each of our crimes. We can just clear the air and get ready.
Eric: I want the air to be very clear, yes. Julia Schifini, you stand accused of being a witch. I knew it the whole time. For flying through the air unassisted, tackling men three times your size, and reminding us that Zeus is a big old fuck-boy, how do you plead?
Julia: I done did it.
Eric: I knew it. Burn! Burn the witch. Brandon Grugle, I also knew you were a witch. You stand accused of being a witch for audio sorcery, flagrant use of the robot voice to make your jokes funnier, and unjust persecution of those who meme. How do you plead?
Brandon: Memes are bad.
Eric: I hate that you hate memes. Get out of here. Go burn! Amanda McLoughlin is an Irish witch.
Amanda: They do exist.
Eric: You stand accused of being a witch for skills of the black magic known as Microsoft Excel, I know, I'm stunned too, cultivation of plants, like way too many plants so you have to be making potions and shit-
Amanda: It's called Miracle-Gro, but we'll move past it, yeah.
Eric: ... and for not seeing any movies that anyone else has seen.
Speaker 5: Been there.
Eric: You have to be a fantastical person. How do you plead?
Amanda: Guilty.
Eric: I knew it. You burn! You burn as a witch. Michael Schubert, you stand accused of being... a wizard? No, it's a witch. For saying Harry Potter was 13 and not 14 in Goblet of Fire. Everyone knows that, you idiot. Saying "Game" for a game-winning shot attempt in pick-up basketball that did not go in, and playing as a villager in Super Smash Brothers but only planting and chopping down trees and engaging in said super smashing, how do you plead?
Mike: I plead guilty, but I know that you are not without sin, Eric Silver-
Eric: Oh, no.
Mike: ... because I have sources.
Eric: He [crosstalk 00:08:45].
Mike: Sources say that you're also a witch, so take the stand and confess for your crimes, because Eric Silver, you have been accused of being a witch for my iPhone wants to do an update, but I'm going to say no.
Eric: I curse your phone. There is no proof.
Mike: You have been cursed for preaching the dark gospel of nutmeg being just a nut.
Eric: It's just a nut.
Mike: For cursing your die to roll specific numbers to make the plot more interesting, and forcing Brandon Grugle to look at memes and eat apples. He does do this.
Eric: He hates both those things. Oh, I plead guilty. I'm also a witch.
Mike: You are a witch.
Eric: That's why we're all a part of Multitude.
Mike: So as we have had it here in Boston, which is just Salem, we're all witches. It's all creepy, it's all cool, so we're going to now hand it off to the creepiest and coolest segment that we have. For that, I will pass it along to Julia Schifini.
Julia: Give me [inaudible 00:09:43].
Audience: Whoo!
Julia: Hello my friends. I realized I don't have three hands, so this will be interesting. For the past three years, I have made my best friend learn about mythology, folklore, and urban legends.
Amanda: Hello.
Julia: That is Amanda McLoughlin over here. I have devised a way of testing whether or not she has retained any of this information. So I present to you today a quiz show. It's an arbitrary and completely random quiz show-
Amanda: Oh, good.
Julia: ... in which I will tell you a story. At the middle point, I will ask Amanda, does this end in a trick or a treat?
Amanda: Oo.
Julia: Treat or Trick, a game show from Spirits.
Amanda: Love that.
Julia: Amanda, I am a generous god because I'm at the god microphone spot here right now, and so I will allow you to have a panel of Witches Three.
Amanda: Oo.
Male: Oo.
Julia: You may consult with them and ask them questions on whether they think the story that I'm telling you is a trick or a treat.
Amanda: Wonderful.
Julia: Then you will make a decision. If you are able to guess four or more out of the seven stories that I tell you, you win.
Amanda: I win! Yay.
Julia: Then you buy me drinks later. It's fine. We're going to start our game. The first story I'm going to tell you... You get fun little pictures like this for each and every one.
Amanda: Wow, so cute.
Julia: Amanda, for a moment please, imagine you're a baby. You are an extremely hungry baby, and you're craving meat. Luckily you're also a smart baby. You know that nearby one of the gods has a bunch of cows.
Amanda: Yes, delicious, delicious, awesome.
Julia: And cute. You being a smart and also hungry baby go to a pasture and manage to steal the cows by leading them backwards so they cannot be tracked.
Amanda: I didn't know cows could walk backwards.
Julia: They can. They're capable animals. However, you are spotted by a guard, and the god shows up at your place and is super pissed. Amanda, does this story end in a trick or a treat?
Amanda: I'm not really seeing a way that this could end well, so my Oracles Three, are there any positive outcomes possible here that I'm not seeing?
Mike: Go viral on TikTok. Is that a thing that teams were doing in 18-
Male: [crosstalk 00:12:07].
Julia: Were hungry babies doing it though?
Mike: I mean in mythology, hungry babies could do lots of shit.
Julia: That's true.
Mike: Here's a little reverse psychology. This set up seems so bad that I think it's a treat.
Amanda: Also, it's a baby, and if the baby died in the story, that would suck.
Male: Yes.
Amanda: Welcome to mythology. Babies die all the time. I think I'm going to shoot my shot here and go treat.
Julia: Give me a reasoning behind... Give me the perfect scenario in which this is a treat.
Amanda: Perfect scenario? The god is like, "Wow. You're so promising and enterprising, baby. Would you be my new paid intern with benefits?" So the god has a protégé. Baby has cows to eat or doesn't eat them and has nectar of the gods, and the cows get to frolic and live long, healthy lives in the pasture by themselves.
Julia: So baby becomes paid intern is your argument here?
Amanda: Yes.
Julia: Okay, great.
Amanda: Baby ascends to the god.
Julia: Great. Amanda, you're Hermes. This is a treat.
Amanda: Yay!
Audience: Yay! Whoo!
Julia: So the story ends, you stole Apollo's cattle who's rightfully pissed, so you play the "I'm baby card" when he tries to take the thing to Zeus.
Male: A baby.
Julia: He brings you to Olympus. Zeus tries to sort things out. Zeus thinks you're kind of adorable and just goes, "Boys will be boys," and doesn't punish you, but instead just makes you give back the cattle.
Amanda: He only ate like two of them.
Julia: It sounds like how people give each other jobs when they're already privileged and in power, so I'm calling myself right here.
Amanda: Correct.
Julia: You give the lyre, which you invented by the way to Apollo. He's so pleased he makes you messenger of the gods.
Amanda: Love it. I'll take it.
Julia: Awesome. We're going to move on to our next story. Long hair, don't care.
Amanda: It's a very good gift.
Julia: Thank you. Amanda, imagine you are a high school student who is coming home late one night from classes or studying. I know this is easy for you.
Amanda: This is already fictional that I would be out late studying. I was home studying.
Julia: You went to a library somewhere. Imagine. Play in this space.
Amanda: Okay, okay. It's not 6:00 p.m. it's 10:00 p.m., okay.
Julia: There you go. This one has to be down. Maybe it's fall or winter. As you were walking home, under a street light you pass a young woman. She has very long hair. It's very beautiful. She's smiles shyly at you from beneath said long hair. You being the useful bisexual that you are smile back at her and then pass on and continue your way home.
Amanda: Okay, thank you.
Julia: So does this end in a trick or a treat?
Amanda: I smile at her and what?
Julia: And just continue your way home. You just pass her.
Amanda: Continue my way home.
Julia: Continue going.
Amanda: This has never happened to me before. I can't imagine that one ending well either. Oracles Three, long hair is ominous, I think. I'm getting some nods. This is good. What is your read here? What do you think about the long hair? Is it ominous? Is it alluring?
Brandon: Do not like. Long hair, do care. Do not like.
Eric: If she was frolicking in a musical and it was raining and she was singing in that same rain, it would still be dangerous. Run away from this person.
Amanda: Or frankly in a meadow at the beginning of Oklahoma. That didn't end well either for them.
Julia: That's true.
Amanda: Cool.
Male: [crosstalk 00:15:22].
Amanda: There's a bright golden haze on the meadow and everything, anyway. So I'm going to go trick.
Julia: [crosstalk 00:15:29]
Amanda: Give me the [crosstalk 00:15:30] that it ended well.
Julia: What's going to happen? Tell me.
Amanda: I think she will follow me home and suck my soul out with some kind of second and third [inaudible 00:15:39] beneath the hair on the shoulders or something.
Audience: Oh!
Julia: I love that you're learning. Me's Harionago, and it's a trick.
Audience: Whoo!
Julia: Her name literally translate to "Hook girl."
Brandon: Bad.
Julia: If you return her smile, that's when she attacks. To let down her long hair, she actually has razor sharp hooked hair which she then attacks you with.
Amanda: Less horrifying than the [crosstalk 00:16:07].
Julia: [crosstalk 00:16:07], though. You can potentially outrun her, and if you can find shelter until sunrise, she will disappear.
Amanda: That's why I never stay out late, Julia. You stay in and study.
Julia: Amanda, it's dark outside right now. Are you okay?
Brandon: There's textbooks back stage.
Amanda: That's true. That's true. I can stay safe.
Julia: All right, you're doing great so far.
Amanda: Thank you.
Julia: I believe in you.
Amanda: Very fun.
Julia: So the next one, story number three.
Male: [crosstalk 00:16:27].
Mike: Wait, hold on.
Julia: [crosstalk 00:16:31] a home. That is a meme of a wolf winking and it says, "Howl ya doing?"
Mike: Julia, did you go to FunnyAsDuck.net and get that photo?
Julia: No, I went to Google. I went to Google. Amanda, imagine you are hanging out and you run into your five best wolf friends.
Amanda: Great, sure.
Julia: They're all just staring at the sky, so when you ask them, "What's up?" they just say, "Nothing. Don't worry about it."
Amanda: That's the whole scenario.
Julia: No, no. We're still going. When you next see them the following night they're still doing the same thing, and you're like, "Hey, what's going on?" So they're like, "Oh, we'll just tell her. It's fine." They tell you that they're staring at the sky because they can see an animal there, wild, crazy. They can't get up there, though, so you're like, "Hey, listen, I got you." You take out a bow and arrow, and you shoot them into the sky so accurately that you create a ladder made out of arrows that you can then climb into the sky.
Amanda: Wow, very impressive.
Julia: You have such skill sets. Put this on your resume.
Amanda: Thank you. I practiced it at night when other people were going to parties.
Julia: Thank you. I'm glad. So you climb the ladder with your wolf friends. Then you get into the sky, and you see a bear there.
Amanda: This is getting more and more eventful as we go along.
Julia: So you warn the wolves, "Hey, listen. That's a bear. You should stay away from the bear." Then the youngest wolf goes up to the bear and then all of the wolves follow. What happens, Amanda? Trick or treat?
Amanda: I'm leaning trick because first of all, I learned from Into the Woods that there are giants in the sky. That's not a place you want to go without being invited there.
Julia: I'm glad you're here for-
Eric: Yeah, use Sondheim, the guy who thinks that dead people in pies is super neat.
Amanda: Excuse me, Oracle, I didn't not call on you yet.
Eric: Sorry. I just think some of us, Sondheim.
Julia: [crosstalk 00:18:17].
Amanda: The witches will stay silent until called upon.
Eric: Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble, Sondheim, Sondheim, Sondheim.
Amanda: Beautiful. This is a cheerocracy, not democracy. I don't like the idea that you're making a portal to the sky without asking. That seems like a very bad idea. [crosstalk 00:18:34]-
Julia: Who do you need to ask to make a portal to the sky?
Amanda: God. I don't know. Also, animals staring at a place, never good. If your cat or dog's looking in the corner? No, there's a ghost there. Don't like that. I just don't think that bothering a bear with five wolves at my side is going to end any other way then someone eating somebody else. But I will consult now with my Oracles Three.
Julia: Oracles, you may speak.
Amanda: What are your thoughts on wolves and bears?
Mike: It is a trick. Wolves don't have thumbs. How did they climb that ladder?
Amanda: Challenging.
Julia: It's very sloped-like stairs.
Mike: I don't like it. I don't like it.
Amanda: Any bear imagery or anecdotes come to mind here?
Brandon: Look, I love bears. I think it's a treat.
Julia: Look at his friend.
Amanda: Look at him.
Brandon: Look at this guy. Look at him.
Julia: Those little beans. They're so round.
Brandon: Look at that little [inaudible 00:19:25].
Julia: Very cute.
Eric: Is it bad that the first thing that I thought of when you said, your five best wolf friends, I'm like, "Where are her other wolf friends? Are they going to find out about it on Insta later and be like, 'Oh, I wish I went into the sky with the bear. I have FOMO for bear sky.'"
Amanda: That is true. I feel like with five wolves at my side, things may go okay for me.
Julia: But you also told the wolves, "Don't do it," and then they didn't listen to you.
Amanda: That's true. I am going to believe in the wolf pack. Part of the cards, wolf pack here, and I'm going to say treat.
Julia: Well, you're Coyote, and it's a treat.
Audience: Whoo!
Julia: So the bears are actually pretty chill.
Brandon: Like I said.
Julia: Brandon was right. The wolves and the bears just kind of hang out. You think, this is a pretty cool thing going on here, all things considered.
Amanda: Yeah, me.
Julia: Maybe people will tell a story about this when they see it and talk about me, me Coyote.
Amanda: I love when you talk about me.
Julia: I know, right? You leave the bears and the wolves and they just hang out. You take your arrow ladder back with you.
Amanda: I leave them in the sky?
Julia: You leave them sky because, surprise, you've just created the Big Dipper.
Amanda: Yay!
Audience: Whoo!
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: Yes, I love it so much.
Julia: Amanda, I have family in town and cooking for more people than I usually do can be a bit of a challenge sometimes.
Amanda: Especially among Italians, people, I'm sure, judge.
Julia: Oh, yes, for sure. But Amanda, I was lucky because my weekly shipment of Hello Fresh just kicked in right as my parents arrived.
Amanda: Very convenient.
Julia: Yes. Hello Fresh is super convenient. It makes cooking delicious meals at home a reality regardless of your comfort in the kitchen. I consider myself a pretty skilled chef, but sometimes I just want to throw together an easier recipe that only takes about 30, 35 minutes.
Amanda: They come with all of the ingredients pre-measured, like pre-portioned, which honestly takes most of the dishes and also time out of cooking because it's all ready to just put in whatever the instructions say.
Julia: Exactly. Hello Fresh is super flexible. It is there to fit your lifestyle. You can add extra meals to your weekly order or double up your meals if you want.
Amanda: If you double the amount of people who are normally in your home and you're home for the week?
Julia: And you can easily change your deliver days, your food preferences, or even skip a week if you're, say, on vacation, doing live shows in Austin, Texas.
Amanda: Yeah, we recently tried a vegetarian box just to see what it was like and get that vegetable quotient here in the depths of winter. We made a vegetarian flat bread that was absolutely delicious. There was cheese. I substituted vegan cheese for myself. There was arugula. There was balsamic. It was like, "Oh my god. Why don't I put balsamic reduction on every single thing I eat?"
Julia: You should.
Amanda: It was delicious, it was easy, and we can do it in the toaster oven.
Julia: Incredible. Yes, Hello Fresh. Super flexible. Super easy to make all their recipes. Now, you can get nine free meals with Hello Fresh by going to hellofresh.com/spiritsnine and using the code, spiritsnine.
Amanda: That nine free meals at hellofresh.com/spiritsnine using the code, spiritsnine. Thanks Hello Fresh and thanks for the delicious meals. We are also sponsored this week by Feals. This is a premium CBD company that delivers CBD to your doorstep. I have said on the show before that this has really helped my insomnia. Listen, every person is different. You have to use the solution that works for you, but for me, just having a few drops of CBD oil right before bedtime helps me go back to sleep if I wake up in the middle of the night. That was my problem where I would wake up at 2:00 in the morning and then be awake for four or five hours, and that's no good.
Julia: Amanda, I just got a humidifier recently, and we started to hook it up in the bedroom now that the heat kicks on in our apartment. Oh, man, adding a little bit of CBD oil to that, it makes me sleep so much better than I usually do.
Amanda: Yeah, it is not anything that's psychoactive, so it doesn't get you high. You don't feel [inaudible 00:23:24]. There's no hangover or addiction. It really is something I didn't know a lot about before I started reading about Feals. They know that this is not the thing that everybody knows a lot about, so they offer a free CBD hotline and text support to help guide you through the discovery process in trying to figure out, "Is this right for me? What product do I start with? How much is appropriate?" They make it all really simple.
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Julia: Feals.com/spirits.
Amanda: Finally, Julia, we are sponsored by Stitch Fix. As you know in this blustery, cold time of year I see you with your blanket on, it is really important to feel warm and also not feel, in my case, like, I don't know, a sleeping bag, which is why I asked Stitch Fix to send me their best sweaters that are tunic length even though I have weirdly long proportions because I want to wear my leggings, Julia. I'm my own boss. I don't have to wear pants if I don't want to. So I have these beautiful sweaters from Stitch Fix. One is a green cable knit. One of them is a mock neck turtleneck, black with long... not billowy, but a little bit of a wider sleeve. It's just so wonderful. It makes me feel like a chic, Parisian librarian. I was so happy with the results.
Julia: You were wearing one in the office the other day. I gasped when I saw you because you looked so cute in it. Oh, Amanda, Stitch Fix nailed it for you.
Amanda: It made me so happy. Stitch Fix, of course, if you don't know, is an online personal styling service. They deliver clothing, shoes, and accessories directly to you that fit your lifestyle, your budget, and also your body. They have brands that you know and love plus exclusive styles that you can't actually buy anywhere else. Basically you just fill out a style profile online. You tell them what sizes normally fit you well, if things are generally short or long or too wide or too narrow in certain parts. You can get really specific to make sure that they help you buy things that you might not pick out for yourself but that you know are going to fit.
Julia: There's no subscription required, so you can pick between [automag 00:25:45] shipments or only getting a few new pieces on demand. Although shipping, exchanges, and returns are always free and the $20 styling fee is automatically applied towards anything you keep in your box, you keep anything, that $20 goes straight to that product.
Amanda: If you end up keeping all five of the items that they send you in your box, you will get 25% off the total price when you go to stitchfix.com/spirits to place your order.
Julia: Yep, that's stitchfix.com/spirits.
Amanda: Once more that's stitchfix.com/spirits. When you get awesome stuff in the mail, please tag us on Instagram. We want to cheer you on.
Julia: We do. We want to see all your cool sweaters this winter.
Amanda: Now, let's get back to the show.
Julia: All right, we are going to story number four. This is a fun one.
Brandon: Julia, [crosstalk 00:26:28] for posting your wedding photos.
Julia: These are just approved so we got back from the photographer. They're not the real thing [inaudible 00:26:34].
Amanda: The groom in this wedding photo looks like the guy from NCIS that isn't related to Tom Hanks.
Julia: What?
Amanda: Right, DiNozzo, yeah. Look it up later. I'm right.
Julia: Amanda, imagine it's the day of your wedding. The whole town has come out for your wedding, and you're having it at this beautiful local place that's in the shadow of a mountain.
Amanda: This is already a nightmare. I don't want to go back to [inaudible 00:26:57]. Don't make it.
Julia: It's in the shadow of a mountain. We just went there.
Amanda: Okay, okay, great, yes.
Julia: We went to a really mountain retreat for my bridal shower. It was great. Amanda was like, "I could see myself getting married here." Anyway, so this is the best day of your life.
Amanda: Okay, [crosstalk 00:27:10].
Julia: Even as you're having your procession through the town, a local monk who is extremely drunk and running around yelling just comes in and interrupts your wedding.
Amanda: Oh, hello friend.
Julia: Not great. You and the rest of the wedding party just start to roll your eyes and send him off. You're like, "All right, man, all right. We're celebrating here. Let's move on."
Amanda: [crosstalk 00:27:31]. I'd call him out, just be like, "Excuse me. Let's proceed. Let's get some crackers into your stomach."
Julia: So you do that. Then he kidnaps you. Everyone tries to chase him to try to get you back. Is it a trick or a trick?
Amanda: I learned from Romeo and Juliet that friars are not to be trusted with brides.
Julia: All right, interesting, interesting, good choice, good choice.
Amanda: It's also the day of a wedding, so I feel like something dramatic might happen, but also like a Shakespearean comedy might end with everyone being okay. So I'm going to refer to the great consumers of beer, my Oracles Three. What are our thoughts on drunk friars and also a wedding processional through a town, which frankly, just feels like asking for trouble?
Julia: I just really love this stock photo.
Brandon: I think he's trying to save you from NCIS guy.
Amanda: It's possible. He's a notorious playboy, DiNozzo.
Brandon: He is.
Julia: He may or may not be related to Tom Hanks?
Amanda: No, the other guy's related to Tom Hanks, the actor, but this is not that one.
Julia: Anyway, it's NCIS.
Mike: In my brain, this is like Runaway Bride starring Richard Gere and Julia Roberts except the monk is making you run away.
Julia: The monk is now Richard Gere.
Amanda: I'm not familiar with the film, so I don't know-
Julia: Of course you're not.
Amanda: ... the plot to where you are referring.
Eric: A witch! That was a callback to an earlier thing.
Brandon: I think treat. Again, it sounds awful, so I feel like it's going to flip the script and be good in the end.
Mike: Maybe he has really good booze back at his place.
Amanda: It's possible. It's possible. All right, I'm going to lean into my gut guessing today, and I will guess treat.
Julia: Well, that's Ji Gong.
Mike: Oh, no. I already don't like it. Oh!
Julia: It's a treat.
Audience: Yay!
Amanda: Hey!
Julia: The drunk monk, Ji Gong, who is also clairvoyant and also has a lot of weird supernatural powers, it's very interesting, so he saw that the mountain peak that you're having your wedding under was going to fall and kill everyone.
Amanda: No!
Julia: So by kidnapping you, he's able to drive all of the wedding party and the rest of the village-
Amanda: Oh, shit.
Julia: ... who came after your wedding, away from the disaster zone.
Amanda: Amazing.
Julia: Yeah, he saved everyone.
Amanda: How do I thank him? By getting drunk on beer?
Julia: Yeah, basically.
Male: Stop it.
Julia: You're like, "Ah, man, thanks."
Male: I believe you-
Julia: Then you guys all have their wedding away from the crashed mountain peak.
Amanda: Yeah, fair.
Eric: I'm going to use this at the next wedding I'm at where I get super trashed and I'm just like, "No, the mountain peak is going to fall, guys."
Julia: But the problem-
Eric: [inaudible 00:29:50].
Mike: Could someone invite Eric to a wedding because I think the next one you're going to is mine?
Julia: Maybe try before February.
Mike: [crosstalk 00:29:58].
Eric: Michael Schubert. Let's get out of the way from the mountain in Texas.
Amanda: Known for its mountains.
Male: [crosstalk 00:30:04] and we're doing shots in the next town.
Mike: We've moved the wedding to Montana.
Julia: It's flat there, right? Amanda, you're doing great so far.
Amanda: Thank you.
Julia: I'm proud of you.
Amanda: I think this is four. However, I do want to see if I can get them all.
Julia: I do. I believe in you.
Amanda: Okay, thank you.
Julia: I believe. Story number five, [inaudible 00:30:27], I love him. I have to pick up my notes. Sorry about that. The Little Mermaid is a reference. Oop, hold on. Got it. I believe in you. This time, Amanda, imagine you are a goddess. You already are-
Amanda: Thank you, thank you.
Julia: ... but let's just imagine for a second. You've been a bit lonely and you fall in love with a mortal.
Amanda: Damn.
Julia: These things happen.
Amanda: My friends warned me.
Julia: You've done this song and dance before, and it hasn't ended well in the past. You know that it's kind of a tragic scene. Your loved one, like wither away and dying when you're an immortal beautiful goddess.
Amanda: I imagine.
Julia: You know, you are one. So approach the king of the gods and ask, "Hey, can you please make my lover immortal so we can spend the rest of our days together?"
Amanda: Listen, that's a big commitment though. How sure am I?
Julia: You're pretty sure. This is like the dude.
Amanda: All right, all right.
Julia: The king feels pity on you, and he agrees, so he grants your wish.
Amanda: Trick, not going to end well. I'm just going to put my guess out there. Oracles, I am sensing disaster here. You might be more optimistic on love than I am in this particular scenario.
Julia: I used Little Mermaid. This is a very positive example.
Amanda: There's a lot of suffering in Little Mermaid.
Julia: Yeah, but then they end up happily ever after.
Amanda: What's our gut check?
Mike: I'm going to be honest. I'm out. I'm paying attention because I was... It doesn't look like she's saying, "Daddy, I love him." I'm really trying to figure out what she's saying.
Julia: It's-
Mike: It looks like, "Lollipop, lollipop."
Amanda: It's just the end where it says, "Love him, love him" over and over again. Anyway.
Mike: You've got your Oracles Two. I'm out.
Julia: So you got two oracles left.
Amanda: It looks like someone's taking cake away from her, and she just wants one last bite, which I relate to wholeheartedly.
Julia: Oracle Brandon or Oracle Eric?
Amanda: Any guesses?
Eric: Amanda?
Amanda: Yes.
Eric: As your partner and life love in podcasting-
Amanda: It's true.
Eric: ... whatever you say, babe.
Amanda: Thank you, thank you.
Mike: I'll be the voice of reason here. It's a trick.
Julia: A trick?
Amanda: Unlike my own life, I'm going to guess trick.
Julia: Well, you're Eos.
Amanda: It's a trick.
Audience: Trick. Whoo.
Julia: It's not great. Zeus is an asshole, so when Eos asks for immortality for your lover, you forget to ask for eternal youth as well.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Julia: Yeah, genie wish kind of monkey paw situation happening here.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Julia: Your lover, Tithonus, lives forever but withers away.
Amanda: Hate that.
Julia: Eventually he gets transformed into a cicada because to quote Homer, "Eternally living but begging for death to overcome him."
Brandon: Aren't we all?
Amanda: Listen-
Julia: That's why they're so loud.
Amanda: Homer, I know this is your jam, but that is dark, my dude.
Julia: Yeah, it's not great.
Amanda: Don't love that.
Julia: We're going to go onto story six now.
Amanda: Oo, all right, we have dog, the vagabond. We have someone in a plaid shirt. Everyone is screeching the pup. I appreciate it.
Julia: What a good boy.
Amanda: Thank you.
Julia: He's just staring there in the background. Imagine you're about to go on a big trip. I thought the guy was giving him a thumbs up. He's giving him a-
Amanda: He's like, "You wait."
Julia: ... wait. So imagine you're going on a big trip. You're likely to never come home again, so your friends throw you a big going away party. You're moving to a new city. It's not like you're leaving because of a curse.
Amanda: That one's a trick, I think.
Julia: After a night of partying, you make your way onto the road, but as you're walking down the path out of town you hear footsteps on the path behind you. You're like, "Oh, that must be one of my friends coming to see me off for one last goodbye," so you turn around. Is it a trick, or is it a treat?
Amanda: Footsteps, road out of town, about to do my new life, not feeling good about this one. Gentlemen?
Julia: Boys?
Amanda: Witches Three, what do we think?
Brandon: I think they're breaking up.
Amanda: Oh, no!
Brandon: It doesn't look good for-
Amanda: That's your dog girlfriend right there.
Julia: No.
Brandon: Look at that dog. It's so sad. I think it's trick.
Mike: I think dog girlfriend is a different myth.
Julia: It is.
Mike: I feel like this could have similar to monk vibes where the creepy footsteps are actually going to tell you something really important, so I am leaning towards treat in that regard. They're going to be like, "Oh, you forgot your keys" or something.
Amanda: So you're [crosstalk 00:34:36].
Brandon: I don't need the keys. I'm leaving.
Eric: I feel like Julia has engineered this so that she can pull some stuff over on us because I have also listened to Spirits, and it's like, oh, the dog is a werewolf and wants to be your lover forever. Then they're OTP. So I just really think that that's what it is. I think it's a treat.
Amanda: I'm going to listen to my Witches Three. I'm going to guess treat.
Julia: Okay, Amanda, well, that's the Okuri-inu, and it's a trick and a treat.
Amanda: Oh! Plot twist.
Brandon: Yours was a trick, Julia.
Julia: So it translates to "the sending off dog." It follows behind you step by step much like a friend sending you off on a long journey.
Amanda: Thanks pup.
Julia: If you trip or stumble, the yōkai will devour you.
Eric: How is this a treat?
Julia: However-
Eric: Oh, no, there it is. There's the twist.
Julia: It's so dangerous that if you have it following you, no other yōkai will dare bother you on your journey. So just walk safe and you're good.
Amanda: That's a pretty good value proposition.
Julia: Yes, [crosstalk 00:35:40].
Eric: I have a question. Why is the treat this thing is so terrible that don't worry, less worse things aren't behind me?
Julia: Listen, all you had to do was keep walking forward and then nothing else bothers you. Have you seen Japanese mythology? There are scary things in the woods.
Eric: Have you seen Hadestown?
Julia: Yes. Don't do it. Don't turn around, you idiot, and then you'll get the person you love but don't deserve.
Eric: Wait? I need to know because it's like, hey, if you get hit by a truck, you won't get hit by a moped. What? You're already hit, so it's a clinger. You are in that hospital, so you're fine.
Julia: Listen, the hospitals are a very safe place.
Eric: It's like, don't worry. You've been put in traction, but there are doctors everywhere.
Julia: It's fine. Don't worry about it. So you have one last one. You're doing good. You're at five and a half at this point.
Amanda: Okay, I'm ready.
Julia: I believe in you. I think you can get six and a half.
Amanda: Thank you.
Julia: The last story, there's a lot of things happening here.
Amanda: There's some gossiping ladies and an argument with a guy with an interesting haircut.
Julia: I'm glad you point out the haircut. It's very important to the story.
Amanda: Nice kitchen. Look at all those posh-
Julia: I know, right?
Amanda: ... containers with brains in them.
Julia: Very good. Very, very good. And she's got fresh flowers when they're gossiping. It's very good.
Amanda: I like to have fresh flowers when I gossip.
Julia: Amanda, you're a princess.
Amanda: Thank you.
Julia: You started dating a god, but you got to keep it on the DL because he got you pregnant.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Julia: Yeah. So around the same time you're having this affair, you meet this really nice girl who just joined your court. She's super cool. You guys hit it off. You're besties. Immediately, [inaudible 00:37:21] suspicious. So you tell her about that bun in the oven which you're keeping secret from [crosstalk 00:37:26].
Amanda: No! Trust no one.
Julia: She's like, "Yeah, I don't know if your guy's who he says he is. He says he a god. Really? Come on, Amanda. Come on, Amanda. You know that's not true." So you have a discussion with your boyfriend. Does this end in a trick or a treat?
Amanda: Oh, man. So much possible suspicion here.
Julia: I tried to give you the most gossipy one. It's like a Dear Prudence letter, there's so much.
Amanda: Bring it on. I'm worried that this newcomer to court who's instantly my best friend does not have my best intentions at heart. Why else would they become fast friends with me like that?
Julia: Listen, maybe you guys just clicked.
Amanda: I know but come on, mythology.
Julia: Imagine you and I in elementary school back in kindergarten.
Amanda: That's true except you bit my brother on our first play date so that was-
Julia: We said he would keep this only to the wedding.
Amanda: But then we didn't have a play date for 10 years, but now we're best friends, so it's great. Sorry.
Julia: I just can't believe we're airing my grievances out like this.
Amanda: I'm sorry. It's Salem. I was taken over.
Julia: Yeah, right.
Amanda: Oh, man, really confused one going either way. Witches Three, thoughts?
Mike: I think it's a trick. I think what's going to happen is that the dude who put the bun in the oven is going to do something good-
Amanda: The baker.
Mike: ... but then he founds out you told someone. Then he's going to be like, "Ah, well, I'm just going to take all my diamonds home for me. I told you not to tell anybody-
Amanda: Psycho, he gave you diamonds?
Mike: ... and you broke my one rule." So I think it's going to end up in a trick because you told Gabby.
Amanda: Fucking Gabby, though. Any other Witches have an opinion about this myth?
Eric: I am more suspicious of Julia, again, now that she [inaudible 00:39:01] with the trick and the treat, so I bet this is neutral. It's like, "And then nothing happened."
Amanda: That's the end of the story.
Eric: Then everything just petered out, and Gabby moved away. So that's what I think it is, neutral.
Brandon: I mostly want to dissect Amanda's trust issues.
Amanda: Yeah, okay. Let's sit down.
Brandon: Can we have five, 10 minutes?
Julia: We've got time to unpack the [crosstalk 00:39:24].
Amanda: Lock it in. It's a trick.
Julia: It's a trick? All right. Amanda, you're Semele. This is a trick.
Audience: Whoo!
Amanda: Yes!
Julia: I'm so proud of you. It's Zeus again. Your best friend's Hera, not great.
Eric: Wait, is this not Gabby?
Brandon: I took Latin in high school. Gabby is the Latin for the Greek Hera.
Julia: She really got you there. You-
Amanda: It's the Greek/Roman pantheon, you know [crosstalk 00:39:50].
Julia: Basically you asked and be like, "Hey, you said you were Zeus. Prove it to me that you're Zeus."
Amanda: Zeus doesn't like that.
Julia: Meanwhile, he made a promise because he didn't want to get into this fight with you, so he's like, "Yeah, I'll just swear on the River Styx. I'll give you whatever you want," which you don't do because you can't break a promise on the River Styx.
Amanda: That's a very important collateral.
Julia: It's like putting it on Twitter. You can't break a promise once it's on Twitter.
Amanda: Don't like that.
Julia: So he has to because he promised on the River Styx. You burst into flames when he shows you all of his glory.
Amanda: A witch!
Julia: A witch. Zeus, then, to save your unborn child, sew him to his leg and then he gave birth to Dionysus later.
Amanda: Fucking classic.
Julia: Brandon, do you have any questions?
Brandon: What?
Julia: Yes?
Brandon: No, I know. We've all had some fun here today, but is that how sex works? Have I been lied to?
Julia: Then Dionysus is a pretty good dude, so he manages to take you out of the Underworld and makes you a goddess later. But mostly you do die and burst into flames, so I'm going to call it a trick.
Brandon: That's a mental health-
Amanda: I'm glad I was right. Sorry for Semele. I'm glad I was right.
Julia: Amanda, you've won Trick or Treat.
Audience: Whoo! Yay!
Amanda: Sorry.
Julia: You're still going out great. Amanda, you won. I'm so proud of you.
Amanda: Thank you for taking me on this tour. Julia Schifini everybody.
Audience: Whoo!
Amanda: I'm going to go drink a beer in the back.
Julia: You did a good job. Give me a high five.