Episode 178: Creepy or Cool? - Bigger in Texas (Live from Austin, TX)

It’s another game of Creepy or Cool? And because we played in Texas, our two teams have to determine whether a series of GIANTS are either big ol’ creeps or the coolest things we’ve ever seen. 

Play along at home

Content Warning: This episode contains conversations about or mentions of cannibalism, natural disasters (tsunamis, earthquakes), drug use, drowning/shipwrecks, fire/burning, funerary rites, improper burial, and dehydration.  

Housekeeping

- Recommendation: This week, Amanda recommends Emily Gould’s Perfect Tunes! Check out our previous book recommendations, guests’ books, and more at spiritspodcast.com/books

- Multitude: Digital merch for all shows, including new Spirits phone wallpapers, are available at http://multitude.productions/merch. Listen to Meddling Adults and Head Heart Gut by joining the MultiCrew. And our newest show, NEXT STOP, has just launched! Check out NEXT STOP in your podcast player or nextstopshow.com!

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Find Us Online

If you like Spirits, help us grow by spreading the word! Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Goodreads. You can support us on Patreon to unlock bonus Your Urban Legends episodes, director’s commentaries, custom recipe cards, and so much more. We also have lists of our book recommendations and previous guests’ books at spiritspodcast.com/books.


Transcript

Amanda:

Welcome to Spirits Podcast, a boozy dive into mythology, legends, and folklore. Every week, we pour a drink and learn about a new story from around the world. I'm Amanda.

Julia:

And I'm Julia.

Amanda:

And this is Episode 178: Creepy or Cool? Bigger in Texas.

Julia:

Man, the Texas live show was so much fun. I had never been to Austin before, and it was so good. What a great city.

Amanda:

We truly had tacos for like seven out of our eight meals there, and I feel like I got everything that I hoped out of the experience. We're so thankful to those who came out for The Spirits Join the Party double header. And we're really, really stoked that we can bring the live show to those of you who were not able to join us in person.

Julia:

Yeah. It's definitely a big creepy or cool, and I think people are going to find it pretty buck-wild.

Amanda:

 I really enjoyed this one. And I also really enjoy that we have some new patrons with us to celebrate today; Sabrina, Sammy G., Rose, Hannah, Kate, Kerry, Jessica, Eric, Hitomi and Jasmine. Welcome.

Julia:

Welcome.

Amanda:

You joined the ranks of such a supporting producer level patrons as Sarah, Landon, Nikki, Megan, Debora, Molly, Scylla, Samantha, Sammy Neil, Jessica and Phil Fresh. And of course, our legend level patrons, Diane, Stephen, Milena, Francis, Clara, Brittany, Josie, Kylie, Morgan, BM Me Up Scotty, Audra, Chris, Mark, Mr. Faulk, Sarah and Jack Marie.

Julia:

You all are wonderful, wonderful beings. And our hearts are as big as the state of Texas when we think of you.

Amanda:

And the drink for this episode, Julia, was provided by the venue. The North Door was kind enough to buy us drinks, and we all really, really loved El Diablo. Tell us what it was like.

Julia:

El Diablo is really, really good. I like a little bit of spicy tartness when I'm having a drink. So this was tequila, lime juice, ginger beer and creme de cassis, which is a black currant liqueur. And I love the flavor of black currant. So anything with black currant, I am 100% in for.

Amanda:

I was also 100% in for the books that I've been reading this week. I have been reading a bunch of rom com books as we do, but I took a break from that to read a book by an author I really, really loved, Emily Gould. She has a new book out called "Perfect Tunes," which is about like music and love and family. And it's takes place in the East Village at the turn of the year 2000, which is a time that I was not yet spending a lot of time in New York City, but I'd like to believe that I was. So I just love a book set in the East Village. And this moves between that time period and then a more contemporary time period. It's wonderful. It's one of those books that you sink into. So I think it would be wonderful for any of our listeners to pick up.

Julia:

That sounds really cool. I'm going to have to check that out.

Amanda:

Absolutely. And we're also so excited to tell everybody this week that we have some new digital merch available for you. Now, our merch distributor DFTBA is still shipping out physical merch. It may take a little bit longer than average, but we thought that it would be a really fun thing to provide some digital rewards and digital merch that people could download right away. So we have put together an absolutely fabulous bundle of wallpapers. You, too, can now have our little Creepy or Cool ice cube, or our logo, or just the big ole word "Spirits," so that when someone looks at your phone and they're like, "Oh, what's that?" You're like, "Oh, it's a great podcast Spirits. I want to tell you all about it." So for just $5, you can download seven wallpapers, and we're so stoked about it. That's at SpiritsPodcast.com/merch.

Julia:

Yeah. They're extremely cool. I think we did a great job in getting those up there. And I think I just enjoy having a little bit more creepy and coolness in my life.

Amanda:

Absolutely. And all the other shows on Multitude as well are getting digital rewards ready. Potterless has a bundle. Join the Party has the full soundtrack from season one, like D&D, like DIY music ambiance kit, the soundtracks from campaigns one and two. And next stop, our new audio sitcom has some wallpapers as well as an absolute banger of a theme song. If you listen to the first 30 seconds of any episode, you know that this theme song is incredible. So we have the full-length song, as well as some very '90s sitcom-y text tones that you can use on your phone.

Julia:

They're really great. If you like the Seinfeld ... they were like that, but better.

Amanda:

They're so good. And all of that, all of the digital and physical merch from all the Multitude shows is available at multitude.productions/Merch. And finally, next week, we are very stoked to be doing a digital virtual live show with the Museum of Science in Boston. That's available at SpiritsPodcast.com/Boston to register for free, and come hang out with us for happy hour.

Julia:

It's going to be a lot of fun. I'm putting finishing touches on the slideshow for it right now. And I think we're all going to have a lot of fun with it.

Amanda:

Speaking of which, in the episode description, we also linked to the slideshow Julia used for this episode of Creepy or Cool. So you can play along at home and look at the frankly disturbing visual aids that she put together for us.

Julia:

You're welcome.

Amanda:

All right. Without further ado, please enjoy Spirits Podcast Episode 178: Creepy are Cool? Bigger in Texas.

               Let me welcome, please, my friends from Spirits, and also Eric and Brandon. Sit down we're going to play.

Eric Silver:

I'm on this side now.

Eric Schneider:

I'm sitting. Give me a second.

Amanda:

I'm standing right now, guys.

Eric Schneider:

You're standing.

Amanda:

Because we are going to play a game show.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Julia:

We're playing creepy or cool, a game show from spirits, but it's not just any Creepy or Cool game. We're playing Everything's Bigger in Texas.

Eric Silver:

Yay.

Amanda:

Yay.

Julia:

You'll notice Bigfoot, also Mothman and a UFO.

Eric Schneider:

Wait.

Julia:

I made it myself in Canva.

Eric Schneider:

Wait. I genuinely thought that was an awesome postcard.

Amanda:

It's so charming.

Eric Silver:

That Canva Pro money totally worth it.

Eric Schneider:

[crosstalk 00:05:46].

Eric Silver:

Wait. Brandon, do you have a theme song for Creepy or Cool?

Eric Schneider:

That's it.

Amanda:

Yay.

Eric Silver:

It sounded [inaudible 00:05:50].

Eric Schneider:

It's good. That's good.

Amanda:

Is it creepy or is it cool? Upwards of [inaudible 00:05:56].

Eric Schneider:

Who knows? It's neither.

Julia:

I love it.

Eric Silver:

I loved it. I think it's both.

Julia:

I love it.

Eric Schneider:

Thank you.

Amanda:

So if you haven't heard of Creepy or Cool before, it is a game show where I describe a cryptid, a yokai, a monster, anything like that, to our teams here. And they have to determine with the information that I give them whether or not the creature is Creepy or Cool. The reason-

Eric Schneider:

It's bad information, y'all.

Amanda:

The reasoning.

Eric Silver:

She doesn't give us enough information until the end, and that it becomes the obvious answer at the end. It's unfair. It's a rigged game against both contestants, and the hosts win somehow.

Amanda:

It's my single favorite thing in the world, so I don't know what you're talking about.

Eric Silver:

Do we need to remove Eric Schneider?

Amanda:

I do always win always because I am a winner. Yay.

Julia:

The rules are completely arbitrary, so the reasoning behind whether or not it is creepy or cool could be literally anything. It's just how I'm feeling today.

Eric Silver:

My favorite person is Julia.

Julia:

Thank you. So would you guys like to-

Eric Silver:

I'm literally on your team.

Julia:

We're speaking of which would you like to introduce your team. Amanda, would you like to go first?

Amanda:

Yes, I would. Oh, you came up with the team name, so I wanted to give you a shot.

Eric Schneider:

Oh, well, thank you. Well, that's actually good, because Amanda and I are partners in both life, love and podcasting. Our full team name is "The only good relationship in all of Greek and Roman mythology."

Julia:

Persephone and Hades exists, sir.

Eric Schneider:

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that getting sent away for six months qualified as squad goals.

Julia:

It's just sometimes you need independence. If it works for them, it works for them, too.

Eric Silver:

They were on a break.

Amanda:

We also did a-

Eric Schneider:

That's a friendship.

Julia:

I want to play.

Amanda:

We also did a little handshake for our team. Do you want to see it?

Julia:

Yes.

Amanda:

It's inspired by Medusa.

Eric Silver:

Hope we got [inaudible 00:07:35].

Julia:

Okay.

Amanda:

Okay. Ready?

Eric Schneider:

Go.

Julia:

You stole that from the movie, "Dodgeball."

Eric Schneider:

Yes.

Julia:

Which Amanda definitely has not seen.

Eric Schneider:

Yes. But I've seen it, and I think it's funny.

Julia:

Kind of.

Eric Silver:

Quick editor's note, because that audio was unusable, they bang their hands on the table right from the movie "Dodgeball."

Amanda:

And then made a hissing sound and the shape of a snake.

Eric Silver:

I'll try to fit the hissing in. If you just heard a random hiss, they also banged hands on the tables right beforehand. Me and Brandon are the banana ghosts.

Amanda:

Oh, excellent. Good fall back.

Eric Silver:

The banana ghost is the coolest cryptid as determined a few weeks ago in Los Angeles. And this is our move.

Amanda:

I didn't expect this.

Julia:

I love it.

Eric Silver:

We did a cool butt bump.

Eric Schneider:

Nailed it.

Julia:

And very cute.

Amanda:

It was a cute butt bump.

Eric Schneider:

Well, since I'm also the editor of Spirits because I'm also Eric Schneider. Editor's note. They just butt bumped, and it's unusable audio.

Julia:

Fair enough.

Eric Silver:

It stayed in.

Eric Schneider:

It's haunted audio.

Julia:

Okay, gang. Are we ready to play some creepy or cool?

Eric Schneider:

Yes.

Eric Silver:

Yes.

Julia:

So the first one up here is the-

Eric Schneider:

No fix.

Julia:

Aigamuchab.

Eric Schneider:

What the actual fuck is this?

Eric Silver:

Wait. Hold on.

Julia:

It's the Aigamuchab.

Eric Schneider:

Can I paint a picture before we start?

Julia:

Yes, go ahead.

Eric Schneider:

The wonderful people at North Door decided, now, we should have an AV capability. But what if it was big? So this screen is the size of an actual regular movie screen.

Julia:

This is Texas.

Eric Schneider:

Everything is bigger in Texas, absolutely. So all these photos we're seeing are very large, once again, not photos, illustrations. They're not photos, that means they're just some real thing that someone took a picture of them with a camera.

Julia:

[crosstalk 00:09:17].

Eric Schneider:

Which you saw the photos. They aren't.

Amanda:

Julia, would you give some information about this horrifying creature?

Julia:

Sure. So this is the Aigamuchab. It is from the Khoikhoi people of southwestern Africa. They are giants with razor-sharp teeth, and most notably, eyes on their feet. I like the person that just went "why?"

Eric Silver:

The soles of their feet, specifically.

Julia:

Great question. So they will attack people, and they will try to eat them. But they are easily outrun, because in order to chase you, they have to do a handstand in order to determine which direction you're running.

Amanda:

Very good.

Eric Silver:

Me.

Eric Schneider:

What's the point?

Julia:

To haunt a nightmare.

Amanda:

Why are you looking at me like I could explain this to you?

Eric Schneider:

Oh no.

Julia:

All right. So you guys have about two minutes on each side to deliberate whether this is creepy or cool.

Amanda:

Well, I'm of two minds here. One, I think inefficiency is sometimes adorable.

Julia:

Uh-uh (affirmative).

Amanda:

And in this case, I think it is pretty neat that he has to do so many handstands.

Julia:

Okay.

Eric Schneider:

I do think that handstands themselves are cool. However, feet on the bottom of your ... Eyes on the bottom.

Eric Silver:

Feet on the bottom of your feet?

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, feet on the bottom of your feet, that's what I have.

Eric Silver:

Double feet.

Eric Schneider:

But eyes on the bottom of your feet is kind of creepy. Also, eyes on the soles of your shoes sounds like a Paul Simon lyric.

Amanda:

It does.

Julia:

It does. You're right.

Amanda:

I'm going to Graceland, baby.

Eric Schneider:

I was just going to say that, oh my God.

Julia:

All right. I'll work out my reaction next time.

Eric Schneider:

It's okay.

Julia:

Oh, it's hard to say. Hard to say. I love it.

Eric Silver:

I have to say creepy, if that's okay.

Julia:

Yeah, I think I'm with you.

Eric Silver:

But I'll hear what they say, and if they say "dumb shit," I'm going to change mine.

Julia:

Okay. All right. Team Banana Ghosts.

Eric Schneider:

This looks like something that is either from Full Metal Alchemist or Attack on Titan. It seems like it's from both at the same time.

Julia:

Attack on Titan feels better to me.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

It's hard to say-

Amanda:

If he was fully naked, then definitely Attack on Titan.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah. The perspective of this photograph is very off. Is he tall?

Julia:

Yes. Everything on here is a giant.

Eric Silver:

It's a giant.

Eric Schneider:

Okay. [crosstalk 00:11:21].

Julia:

Everything is bigger in Texas.

Eric Silver:

So not 11-feet tall?

Eric Schneider:

Okay.

Eric Silver:

I think it's ... I don't know. I mean, I agree with my esteemed Eric that this is in fact-

Eric Schneider:

Your esteemed Eric?

Eric Silver:

... cool to do handstands. Did you say that?

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Julia:

Yeah. Yeah. Maybe.

Eric Schneider:

It's not cool to wear whatever the fuck this thing is wearing, like-

Eric Silver:

It's just like the cloth-

Eric Schneider:

... some robe and then do a handstand. Not cool.

Amanda:

Oh, you're going to really love one later.

Eric Schneider:

What I don't know about this image is you can see the outline of the butt. Do you see that?

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Did you see the outline of the butt?

Eric Schneider:

I don't like it. [crosstalk 00:11:56] like a heart.

Amanda:

To the giant's credit, wearing modest garments, because it spends a lot of time upside down.

Eric Silver:

Julia, I'm going to ask one question, and this will determine that. But I'm going to-

Eric Schneider:

But then when you go to the bathroom ... Mm-hmm (negative).

Eric Silver:

Obviously, the eyes on the head see upside down.

Julia:

Mm-hmm (affirmative).

Eric Silver:

Do the feet I see right side up?

Julia:

Yes.

Amanda:

Oh.

Eric Silver:

I'm going to say cool then.

Julia:

Okay.

Eric Silver:

He's seeing from two perspectives at once. That's cool.

Eric Schneider:

This monster is buck-wild and not efficient, and it's not going to catch anyone. So I got to say, he's doing it for cool points.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

So cool.

Eric Silver:

Yeah, cool. We're going.

Julia:

So you're going creepy over there?

Amanda:

We're going creepy.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah. Let's do it.

Julia:

Okay. And you guys are going cool. Okay. So the answer is ... creepy.

Eric Schneider:

Yes.

Julia:

Yes. I feel like you would be cool if you could run down a person while also doing handstands, like [crosstalk 00:12:42].

Amanda:

Running.

Eric Schneider:

Running. Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Julia:

Yeah. Like an American Ninja Warrior.

Eric Silver:

Right. It's going to turn on us though.

Amanda:

This is just big inefficient, unfortunately.

Julia:

But you're also bad at hunting people. Sorry, bro.

Eric Silver:

That's a cool, though.

Julia:

No, it's bad.

Eric Silver:

Cannibalism is bad.

Julia:

Cannibalism is ... Sometimes it's beautiful-

Eric Schneider:

Julia.

Julia:

- in context. Welcome to [crosstalk 00:13:01].

Eric Schneider:

It's like you guys don't listen to Spirits.

Amanda:

Geez.

Eric Schneider:

They talk about cannibalism being okay all the time.

Amanda:

It's not okay.

Eric Schneider:

Acceptable.

Julia:

Complex. So the next one up is the Ahkiyyini.

Eric Silver:

What?

Julia:

So this is a skeletal spirit from Inuit folklore. When a person spends too much of their life dancing or playing the drums, they turn into an Ahkiyyini in death. They play their arm bones as drums like a xylophone. And if the music is powerful enough, it can create tsunamis and earthquakes. This shit is so cool.

Eric Schneider:

Okay. Now, do they turn into this after death?

Julia:

They have to die first.

Eric Schneider:

Okay. So they have to die.

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

But that's good. Who is the judgment person who says, "Hey, you've been playing xylophone too much."

Julia:

You've been just dancing too much. It's the guy from Footloose.

Eric Schneider:

Is this the Japanese folklore?

Julia:

No. It's Inuit.

Eric Schneider:

Oh, Inuit. Yeah, like, Inuit Kevin Bacon comes down from the heavens and tells you, "You've been dancing too much. Stop."

Julia:

No. Kevin Bacon likes pro dancing.

Amanda:

He's pro dance-

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, but he's the avatar of dance. He's the avatar of dance, guys. That's what I'm saying.

Amanda:

Okay.

Eric Schneider:

It's a good joke.

Amanda:

But so he's saying, "You're not being punished for dancing too much. You're actually being rewarded."

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Amanda:

Kevin Bacon. I'm Kevin Bacon.

Eric Silver:

Is this a punishment?

Amanda:

It's cool.

Julia:

It's considered a punishment.

Eric Silver:

Oh. See, I thought it was a good thing.

Julia:

No. No. It-

Eric Schneider:

Are you forced to do this?

Julia:

Yes, you are forced to become this. It is a punishment. They're saying all you're doing is dancing in life. Maybe you should stop.

Eric Schneider:

Julie, I have a question.

Julia:

Yes.

Eric Schneider:

What's the music like? Is it spooky?

Julia:

I don't know, man.

Eric Silver:

It's definitely spooky. He's playing.

Julia:

And Kevin's gone to one of his concerts.

Eric Silver:

He's playing his own ribcage as a xylophone. Also, he's clearly causing a tsunami for his loved ones.

Julia:

Yeah. That's challenging.

Eric Silver:

Because he's quite tall.

Eric Schneider:

First, I just want to say it's cool as fuck to play drums in the afterlife forever.

Eric Silver:

I think it's creepy.

Julia:

It's not in the afterlife. You're still existing.

Eric Silver:

I think it's creepy, but Julia is going to be like, "Oh no, but he's like a cool musical boy." And I think that he's cool, so I want to stick with cool.

Eric Schneider:

I was literally just going to say that. I was going to say like, "Hey, if I know Julia, the bullets are going to be like, I would also like to be a skeleton. Two, I would love to create tsunamis, and three, I dance all the time and no one gives me any praise."

Julia:

Have you ever seen me really dance?

Eric Schneider:

It doesn't mean that you don't do it by yourself in Long Island.

Julia:

Ouch.

Eric Silver:

So are we going creepy or cool?

Eric Schneider:

I want to go cool. Let's go cool.

Eric Silver:

Do you feel strongly about that?

Eric Schneider:

I mean that's cool as fuck.

Eric Silver:

Okay. Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

I want to be this guy.

Eric Silver:

We're sticking with cool. We're sticking with cool.

Julia:

All right. Team Best Relationship in Greek and Roman Folklore.

Eric Silver:

Bang bang.

Julia:

Bang bang.

Amanda:

I do want to be contrarian here. I like the idea that you could play yourself as an instrument, but I don't like the idea that you have to. So, that and then the tsunami, I am going to go creepy, I think, if you are [inaudible 00:15:55].

Eric Silver:

I'll give you creepy. I do think Julia's going to say it's cool. But I'll let you, I'll concede.

Julia:

Let's see.

Eric Silver:

Yes.

Julia:

It's cool. Come on, guys.

Eric Silver:

Yes.

Eric Schneider:

The exact text of what I said.

Julia:

Please applaud.

Eric Schneider:

It's going to be on the screen.

Julia:

The drummer is always the [inaudible 00:16:07].

Eric Schneider:

Eric Silver has left his seat and got in front of the stage.

Eric Silver:

Also, I should have known Jake is a drummer.

Julia:

I married a drummer.

Eric Silver:

Jesus Christ.

Julia:

So come on, guys.

Eric Schneider:

I didn't even know about it.

Julia:

Come on, guys.

Eric Schneider:

I didn't even know that.

Julia:

He's a drummer. He played melodic death metal for a significant amount of time.

Eric Silver:

Which is exactly what this monster is.

Eric Schneider:

How did I not know anything about this?

Eric Silver:

This monster is the epitome of melodic death metal. I literally said this.

Julia:

Would you like to read it for the audience at home, Eric?

Eric Silver:

Dude just enjoyed playing some music while he was living. Come on.

Julia:

All right. You can read the last one, too.

Eric Silver:

Now? Now, he jams so hard that his music can cause earthquakes. Metal's hell.

Eric Schneider:

I would like to reinstate that Julia's my favorite person.

Julia:

I goofed on that one. Yeah, you did a little bit. I'm sorry.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

It's all right. Relationships are about compromise. And I hope you trust me when I say Julia's going to say some shit later.

Julia:

I do. All right. We're going to move on to the next one, which is the-

Eric Schneider:

No, thanks.

Julia:

The Tripodero.

Eric Silver:

I love this thing.

Eric Schneider:

You love this thing?

Eric Silver:

This thing is very cool. I think it's pretty cool. It looks like one of the monsters on The Mist.

Eric Schneider:

I love it. All right. Julia.

Julia:

So, this is the Tripodero. It is a fearsome critter from the wilds of North California. It is said to have two telescopic legs and its head appears to be just a large snout.

Eric Schneider:

Hey, same.

Julia:

It hunts birds and small animals. When spotting its prey, it will slowly extend its legs to get a clear view. And then it will shoot the prey with a mud pellet from its mouth, studying the prey which allows it to devour it.

Amanda:

Okay. I'm going to I'm going to shoot my shot right now. Julia loves the fact that owls have little pellets that they poop out. I think she's going to find it very cool that it's a mud shot.

Julia:

To be fair, they don't even even poop them out. They just regurgitate them.

Amanda:

Regurgitate. Cool.

Julia:

It's very cool.

Amanda:

I don't want to be wrong, but here we are. Two, I think the tripod legs are very cool. And I think Julia would like to sometimes, but not always, sometimes be taller to reach things on shelves.

Julia:

That's true.

Eric Silver:

Hey, Schneider, can I pitch you a thing?

Eric Schneider:

Yeah. Go pitch me.

Eric Silver:

Uh-oh. What's happening?

Eric Schneider:

Chair's moving.

Eric Silver:

Watch this. Ready?

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Brandon has squatted.

Julia:

Very cool.

Eric Silver:

Very cool. Okay. You're good. You're really cool. See, I think along the same lines of what Amanda just said. But I think Julia is ultimately jealous of how tall this thing can get. And she finds that creepy possibly. I don't know. I just lost head, heart, gut because I assaulted her. I might have done it again just now. So who knows?

Julia:

That's predetermined. I can't go in and change them.

Eric Silver:

No, I know. But I might have guessed incorrectly because of this. I mean-

Eric Schneider:

Are you all accepting new applications or ... Sorry. When we just said when we determine who the teams were, Eric immediately said, "I want Brandon." So-

Eric Silver:

I wanted to switch him up. I wanted to switch him up.

Julia:

I just think it's also cool to sniff and having a big [inaudible 00:19:05] would be cool.

Eric Schneider:

It is very cool to sniff unless you have allergies.

Julia:

I want to point out something particular on the photo to the right. He has a little scope. He sure does.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah. I love it.

Julia:

Like he's scooping it out and then he's going to shoot it.

Amanda:

This is a steampunk ass mythical creature. I think [crosstalk 00:19:25].

Eric Schneider:

This is a [inaudible 00:19:25]. 

Eric Silver:

I think I'm going to land on cool. I feel I want to land on cool.

Eric Schneider:

Cool as fuck.

Eric Silver:

I just wanted to give the possible creepy solution.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, that's right.

Eric Silver:

But I think we're going to land on cool.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah. 360 no scope with this bird. Cool.

Julia:

Yeah. All right. Cool.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Julia:

Hell, yeah. Points to both teams.

Eric Schneider:

Yay.

Julia:

All right. So, his mouth is a blowgun and it's extremely cool.

Amanda:

Very cool.

Eric Schneider:

Ninja bird.

Amanda:

Also, telescopic legs. He can be big and small, the best of both worlds. And also, his mouth go [pew pew 00:19:57].

Eric Schneider:

Didn't I just make the case at a [inaudible 00:20:04] that it would be cool to be able to be smaller, to fit on airplanes?

Amanda:

Yes. Yes. You did.

Eric Schneider:

I think I literally just made this argument.

Amanda:

You did. You did. All right.

Julia:

Very good. What a blessed selection.

Eric Schneider:

What now, Jet Blue? I have telescopic legs.

Julia:

Well, guys, we're getting into the yokai section. Oh, no. So, this is [Daidarabotchi 00:20:24]. It is a giant yokai resembling a bald monk with big rolling eyes and a long lolling tongue. They are the largest type of yokai. It's like a category rather than an individual. And they are so large that their movements shape the world around them. They are even said to be big enough to move mountains around. Just like pick up a mountain, just like off we go.

Eric Schneider:

What do they do with them?

Julia:

Yeah. It doesn't matter.

Eric Schneider:

I love this because this is such a Dungeon and Dragons monster, because you need a large shadow man who, when you say there's a mountain somewhere in the world, and then your player's like, "I want to go to that mountain." And you're like, "I don't want to play on that mountain." And then you're like, "Oh, the big shadow man picked it up and walked away."

               Sorry, part of my great fantasy world. And they're like, "Oh, nice," as we don't listen to spirits. Why don't you do? And then I'm like, "Yes, I did that."

Julia:

You're welcome.

Amanda:

This yokai reminds me of a glacier, and glaciers are fucking awesome.

Julia:

All right.

Amanda:

So I'm leaning cool on this one.

Julia:

I meant a pro-glacier.

Amanda:

Pro-glacier. We're also from Long Island which displays all of the features of glacial landscape shaping which is very rare [crosstalk 00:21:31].

Julia:

We learned that in sixth grade.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

I thought you were going to say, "In Long Island, we see all the features of large shadow bald men."

Amanda:

Listen-

Eric Schneider:

I would watch this unit.

Eric Silver:

I was walking to Bagel Boss. They move our shit. I hate it.

Eric Schneider:

Eric, I have no idea.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. So real quick that's his ... On the picture to the right-

Amanda:

His leg?

Eric Silver:

That's his leg.

Amanda:

That's his leg?

Julia:

That's his leg?

Eric Silver:

That's his leg, right?

Julia:

Oh, that's a leggy over the mountain.

Eric Silver:

It's like a sexy leg over the mountain.

Eric Schneider:

Why? That leg-

Julia:

Mid-crawling over it.

Amanda:

That's not how you walk.

Eric Silver:

That's creepy. I'm going to say that's creepy. I also want to like, "Where is he when he's not here?"

Julia:

It's a great question.

Eric Silver:

For the listener perspective, the mountain is let's say a thousand feet tall. The man is about 2,000 feet tall, so he could easily, as Julia said, pick up a mountain and move it. No problem there. But where is he the rest of the time?

Eric Schneider:

Did he just hide behind a mountain? He's just like [inaudible 00:22:23].

Eric Silver:

He's just lying down in a valley which [inaudible 00:22:26]. That's creepy. That's creepy. You've just peaked Mount Fuji, and you look down on the other side of the valley. Big shadow man sleeping, creepy. You don't want to see that. You've got to leave now.

Amanda:

Would it be better or worse if his back was forest? Because he can lay down.

Eric Schneider:

Is his tongue river? I don't know. We're going creepy. We're going creepy. I think that if his back ... Now, we're getting to a Shadow of Colossus situation. I don't know if it's better or worse, but in the current situation, it is not good.

Amanda:

Okay.

Eric Schneider:

So I'm going creepy. We're going creepy.

Amanda:

Creepy?

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Amanda:

What do you think, Eric?

Eric Silver:

I think cool. I think this is a neat friend. And I don't know if this is about me personally, but I think that Julia also saw that picture on the left, which is amazing. It's like a sunset in the back. There are people running away. This guy looks like he's from Shel Silverstein.

Amanda:

It's definitely like a Julia lock screen on her phone.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. Definitely.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

What Shel Silverstein book?

Eric Silver:

Have you not looked at the illustrations in Shel Silverstein books?

Amanda:

They're very dark.

Eric Silver:

Dark as hell.

Amanda:

Very dark.

Eric Silver:

So, I like this a lot and I don't know [crosstalk 00:23:32]-

Eric Schneider:

This does look an outline of Shel Silverstein.

Eric Silver:

I personally want to say cool.

Julia:

So do I.

Amanda:

So you guys are team creepy [crosstalk 00:23:39].

Eric Silver:

They're cool.

Amanda:

Cool. All right. I will say before I go to the next one, this does remind me of a very good Calvin and Hobbes strip where he like-

Eric Schneider:

What Calvin and Hobbes strip?

Amanda:

Calvin and Hobbes, where he always makes the weird snowmen, and he does one where it's like the guy looking over the hill.

Eric Schneider:

Is my childhood terrible?

Amanda:

Yeah. All right.

Eric Silver:

Everything's terrible. That's the show.

Eric Schneider:

Yay.

Julia:

Yay.

Amanda:

Cool.

Eric Schneider:

Let's go.

Amanda:

Go. Bring it on.

Eric Schneider:

That's cool, baby.

Amanda:

You're just a big baby boy.

Julia:

Well, you're just cool.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Amanda:

Knew it.

Julia:

We love architects here on Spirits. And this guy is just an architect form in the world.

Amanda:

There it is, like a glacier. Think about it.

Julia:

He's taking mountains and putting them elsewhere. It's very cool.

Amanda:

I knew you were going to say I am baby. It's so good.

Julia:

Or he's like a little kid, just like playing in the land box of our lives. And our sandbox is tiny.

Amanda:

Only instead of castles that fall over very soon, because it is dry sand and not wet sand. He gets to shape the world, which is great.

Julia:

We're just ants in his life. Very cool.

Eric Silver:

When have we ever said a pro architect pick up this podcast.

Julia:

Amanda and I are pro-architects, not-

Eric Silver:

[crosstalk 00:24:44] episodes. What?

Julia:

Not without [inaudible 00:24:45], but like shaping the world, leaving your mark on the world.

Eric Schneider:

I love the bullets, Julia, because the bullets Julia took like an edible an hour ago. It's just like working it out, man.

Amanda:

Big baby boy.

Eric Schneider:

No, it's just like you are in conversation with bullets, Julia.

Julia:

Yeah. It's wonderful.

Eric Schneider:

I kind of forget I go to a fugue state when I write things. It was like, "Listen, she was right."

Julia:

Amanda, I have been craving a burger for about a month now.

Amanda:

No, no.

Julia:

You know how it like, when you make them at home, they just never come out as good as they do when you get takeout burgers or go to a restaurant and get burgers? So I had been craving it so, so badly specifically Five Guys Burgers. I wanted a Five Guys burger so badly.

Amanda:

That makes sense.

Julia:

Luckily, Amanda, I pulled up my phone. And I opened up my DoorDash app, and I ordered me some Five Guys. And I was just so satisfied by the end of it. And thankfully, Five Guys is one of those restaurants in my community that I can continue supporting with DoorDash. There are thousands of restaurants that are open for just delivery or pickup. And right now, you could use the DoorDash app to patron those restaurants. You can support those restaurants with DoorDash. And DoorDash is an app that brings you the food you're craving right now, right to your door, which is what I did when I got my sweet, sweet burger.

               Ordering is super easy. You just open up that DoorDash app. You choose what you want to eat. And your food will be left safely outside your house with a new contact list delivery drop-off setting. So, there are over 300,000 partners in the U.S., Puerto Rico, Canada and Australia. You can support your local go-to's. You could choose your favorite national chains like Chipotle or Wendy's, or Amanda's favorite, The Cheesecake Factory. Shout out to Cheesecake Factory.

Amanda:

It's so good.

Julia:

And of course, many of your favorite local restaurants are still open for delivery. You just have to open that DoorDash app. You select your favorite local restaurant. And then your food will be left for you at your door. And you'll tip the driver a lot of money because they are out there bringing you food, and we appreciate them.

Amanda:

Absolutely.

Julia:

And the best part is DoorDash deliveries, like I said, are now contactless. It's designed to keep the communities that we operate in safe and keep essential employees like your DoorDash delivery person safe as well. So, right now, our listeners can get $5 off their first order of $15 or more and zero delivery fees for their first month when you download the DoorDash app and enter the code CREEPY. Again, that's $5 off your first order and zero delivery fees for a month when you download the DoorDash app in the App Store and enter the code CREEPY. Don't forget that is the code CREEPY for $5 off your first order with DoorDash.

               We're also sponsored this week by HoneyBook. If, like me, you are an entrepreneur or a freelancer or a small business owner who got into doing what you're doing because you love to do it, and/or you're really good at it, but there is a lot of administrative work around running a business that can sort of take away from the part of the job you actually love. So, HoneyBook is one of those tools that can help you take tasks off your to-do list so you can focus on why you actually started your business in the first place.

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               All right. We're going to move on to the next one, which is kind of similar to this one. And it's the-

Eric Silver:

No.

Amanda:

No, it's not similar, Julia.

Eric Silver:

Oh, shit. That's cool.

Eric Schneider:

That's a Murakami as shit on the left. Oh, no.

Julia:

All right. So, this is a giant aquatic Yokai whose name means "sea monk." Their true form is unknown since they've only been seen from the shoulders up. It will appear on calm nights, turning the sea rough and attempting to destroy boats that it comes across.

Amanda:

What's under the water, guys?

Julia:

It will demand a barrel from the ship, which it will use to pour water on the ship, effectively trying to drown them. But-

Eric Schneider:

Oh, a single barrel? A barrel?

Julia:

Yeah. I would just keep-

Eric Schneider:

It asks for one barrel of water to pour on the shit.

Julia:

And just like refilling it into the ocean.

Eric Silver:

All right. Okay. With all the water.

Julia:

But a clever sailor we'll give it a barrel with a bottom removed. And then, it's just like, "What's happening?" And then they just sail away.

Amanda:

All of these fucking myths are just like riddles. It's like Google is trying to hire you as an engineer. And then they walk in and they give you some math bullshit. And instead, you're like, "Ah, the barrel has no bottom."

Julia:

The barrel has no bottom.

Amanda:

So you can't drown when there's nothing being poured on your ship.

Eric Silver:

So this guy's a monk?

Julia:

Yeah. They're all monks.

Eric Silver:

The last one was a monk.

Julia:

If they're bald, they're a monk basically.

Eric Silver:

What's wrong with monks? Oh, if they're bald, they're a monk.

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Okay. I got it. Brandon, what's your-

Julia:

It depends. You can see it that way.

Eric Silver:

You seem to have a very strong reaction to that.

Eric Schneider:

This guy's cool as hell.

Eric Silver:

Do you think he's cool?

Eric Schneider:

He's just a nice guy [crosstalk 00:30:06] long. He's trying to drown sailors, which I'm generally-

Eric Silver:

Brandon-

Eric Schneider:

... opposed to.

Eric Silver:

But look, the image on the right. Is it dripping with mud and seaweeds? I mean, I think that is cool.

Eric Schneider:

That's cool as hell.

Eric Silver:

I do like that. I do like it. He's a big monk boy. He's just chained to this little guy on the shore.

Eric Schneider:

Look.

Eric Silver:

That seems nice.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, exactly. Here's what I-

Eric Silver:

He's not doing anything aggressive on the picture at the right. I don't see a problem there.

Eric Schneider:

Here's what I imagine happening.

Eric Silver:

He's sinking the boat on the left though.

Eric Schneider:

Also, why does he have sideways pupil [inaudible 00:30:30].

Julia:

Oh yeah, that's very challenging.

Amanda:

I was about to say he does have cool goat eyes on the right.

Eric Schneider:

Cool goat eyes.

Amanda:

His eyes are very creepy.

Eric Schneider:

He is not trying to sink the boat. He's just playing with the boat. He's not that dumb. He knows that there is not bottom in the barrel, but he's like, "Ho, ho, ho, it's just so fun."

Eric Silver:

But there is a bottom of the barrel.

Eric Schneider:

No, but-

Eric Silver:

He drowns them.

Julia:

Unless you're smart.

Eric Silver:

No, but clever sailors.

Amanda:

Freaking.

Eric Silver:

Which is also is a clever-

Eric Schneider:

So really, he's improving. Don't say like [inaudible 00:30:54], but he's winning out the battle.

Eric Silver:

Yes.

Amanda:

Okay. I-

Eric Silver:

Well, Brandon thinks that drowning sailors is fun and neat.

Amanda:

Real cool, guys.

Eric Silver:

Shout out. I'm just going to call the coastguard real quick, and then we'll just get this show going again.

Amanda:

I think this guy is creepy. I don't think he needs to be endangering the boats that way. And I don't like how he is just a void. And I don't like now thinking about if is it an octopus under there? Is it a person? Are they big fish? I don't know.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, we are anti-big fish here.

Amanda:

Fish though-

Julia:

It's too big.

Eric Silver:

Fish. Why do fish do big underwater? Why the fish so big?

Julia:

Eric's saying a very convincing impression of when I am too sleepy.

Eric Silver:

What if Yokai fish too big? I'm going to sleep.

Julia:

Yeah. I'm voting creepy here.

Eric Silver:

Definitely creepy.

Amanda:

Creepy?

Eric Schneider:

Yeah. I think we're going to go cool. I am opposed to the drowning of sailors, but I think-

Amanda:

[Crosstalk 00:31:57] get off.

Eric Schneider:

... I want to say that's overall he is cool.

Amanda:

We're taking-

Julia:

What is [crosstalk 00:32:03] there?

Eric Silver:

Wait. Hold on. Wait. I like when [Schneider 00:32:06] just did. It was like he's running mate made a gap. He's like, I'm going to make an official statement. I am anti-sailors drowning. My running mate [crosstalk 00:32:16].

Eric Schneider:

[crosstalk 00:32:16] made the primary.

Eric Silver:

My roommate [crosstalk 00:32:19].

Eric Schneider:

Right the end.

Eric Silver:

He had a slip of the tongue, and we are donating $50,000 to the coastguard right now.

Eric Schneider:

What if underwater just like leather jackets and like-

               Leather jackets?

Eric Silver:

What else is cool, you all?

Julia:

Because he's cool apparently.

Eric Silver:

You all can see his shoulders. We would know if there's a leather jacket [crosstalk 00:32:35]. [Crosstalk 00:32:35].

Eric Schneider:

What if he fogs the underwater?

Julia:

What is fogs underwater?

Eric Schneider:

Let's go cool. Let's figure this out. Let's find out. Let's find out what this guy is.

Julia:

All right. So creepy, cool.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Julia:

All right. Great.

Eric Silver:

It's [inaudible 00:32:48].

Julia:

It's crazy, guys.

Eric Silver:

Let's go. Clap, clap. We definitely got it.

Julia:

He's standing there in the middle of the ocean. It'd be creep.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, like all fish.

Julia:

The known element of the sea, extremely creepy. Amanda and I vibe in on that one.

Amanda:

Hell yeah.

Eric Silver:

Julia, you didn't write what if big fish under there?

Julia:

Not a big fan of this ocean man.

Amanda:

Not a big fan of ocean man.

Eric Silver:

Just doesn't like him.

Eric Schneider:

I really appreciate the rhyme in that one.

Julia:

[Crosstalk 00:33:15] of this ocean room. Thank God, I didn't do that on purpose. All right. We're going to move on to the next one, which is-

Eric Silver:

Oh.

Amanda:

It's just Flaming teeth.

Eric Schneider:

His name is Flaming Teeth?

Eric Silver:

Julia-

Amanda:

I love these all. They're so cool.

Julia:

What if Teeth Fire?

Eric Schneider:

What if Teeth on Fire and Burn?

Amanda:

[crosstalk 00:33:36]

Eric Silver:

Sorry. His name is just Flaming Teeth.

Julia:

Yeah. It's just Flaming Teeth.

Eric Silver:

Real quick. I do have to make a correction.

Amanda:

Go.

Eric Silver:

That is a photo.

Amanda:

It is. But it's an artistic recreation that they took a photo of.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. I just want to say, this one, we do have a photo of a version of him.

Amanda:

Okay.

Julia:

Tell us about this.

Amanda:

So, this is from Fijian mythology. He is a giant so large that his teeth appeared to be burning logs. The story goes that he was terrorizing villages until a band of brave men planned an ambush and lured him under a rock and then crushed him.

Julia:

Oh.

Amanda:

Like you do.

Julia:

Big rock.

Amanda:

Though they killed the giant, his teeth were still aflame, so the men took the teeth and they brought fire to their village for the first time. And that's how people got fire.

Julia:

Fuck yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Hell yeah.

Eric Silver:

Cool. Cool.

Julia:

Fuck yeah. Fire. Awesome.

Eric Silver:

We don't know where the fire came from. Very creepy. I don't know.

Eric Schneider:

That is so much better than Prometheus. Prometheus is just like, "I'm a man, and I'm going to steal from another man." But this is like, "My teeth are so neat that I'm going to create society." I love it.

Julia:

He was also like terrorizing these poor people who didn't have fire.

Amanda:

No, that's true. But listen, I think it's really cool for even though you did some destructive things for you to give a generous act as your final gift to the world.

Julia:

I don't think he had a choice in the matter, Amanda.

Amanda:

That is true. That is true. I do think that it's cool that the fire didn't burn out. Pretty mental.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. I don't think this guy wanted to give fire to anyone.

Julia:

No. Look at them. Look at those eyes.

Eric Silver:

I think it's just a byproduct.

Eric Schneider:

Its eyes are bad.

Eric Silver:

Yeah, eyes are bad.

Eric Schneider:

And do you have snake in the first one?

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Okay. I was just ... Okay.

Eric Silver:

He has snake in the first one and then a skull in the second one. Made no sense.

Eric Schneider:

He looks like me during finals week in the second picture, just like I'm stressed out.

Eric Silver:

I will say, and this one is for Brandon. Brandon, this is ... Flaming teeth is my favorite Muppet.

Julia:

Did not get that joke.

Eric Silver:

It just sounds like a Muppet name.

Julia:

Okay.

Eric Silver:

That's it. That's the joke.

Eric Schneider:

I love Muppets.

Eric Silver:

And Brandon also loves Muppets.

Eric Schneider:

Thank you. What are you saying?

Eric Silver:

I'm genuinely on the fence about this. I'm creepy.

Eric Schneider:

I'm saying creepy.

Eric Silver:

I think it's cool that he did give fire despite it did require-

Eric Schneider:

He didn't give fire.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

He was murdered and they took the fire. And they took the fire.

Eric Silver:

He didn't give the fire. He was haunting people. Neither of the pictures are great. Defending his mother and-

Eric Schneider:

He's a real jerk.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. We're going to go with creepy. We're going to go with creepy.

Eric Schneider:

Creepy.

Julia:

Eric, let's figure this out. What do you think?

Eric Silver:

I like, eventually ... The thing is, Julia and her story, she focused just on the fire teeth, so I feel like she's hiding something very large from us. And I don't know if she's hiding a bad thing or a really cool thing. It sounds like she's hiding a very bad thing.

Eric Schneider:

She's just like season six of Survivor we're metagaming.

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Well, I have an immunity idol. And I'm going to pull it out to say that I think it's like, yeah, Flaming Teeth also ate the entire priest tribe.

Julia:

Yeah. This is though much cooler than Jeff Probst just giving you Flint now. Like, come on. What are we even doing here?

Eric Silver:

Here. Here is Flaming Teeth.

Eric Schneider:

My favorite legend is when Jeff Probst gave men fire.

Julia:

But he only does it after the survivors killed the giant.

Eric Silver:

Listen, Jeff Probst might be a legendary creature. He only wears the same color. He only wears blue. He has the same facial reactions and body reactions. He always goes, "Winner! [ouka tie 00:36:45] tribe!" And he throws his hands up in the air in the same way. So, I do think, one, Jeff Probst is cool, but Flaming Teeth definitely creepy. Julia's hiding something.

Julia:

All right. Let's do it.

Amanda:

All right. So both teams are going creepy in this situation.

Eric Schneider:

Mm-hmm (affirmative). Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah. It's going to be-

Julia:

It's cool. [crosstalk 00:36:59] Yay!

Eric Schneider:

I got in my head.

Julia:

Come on, gang. He's the coolest fucking thing I've ever seen in my entire life.

Amanda:

I was trying to think what Julia would say here. And I was thinking like, "Flaming Teeth, come on."

Eric Silver:

Really?

Amanda:

Did you see that serpent thing with the teeth that were on fire?

Eric Silver:

[Crosstalk 00:37:14] look cool.

Amanda:

It was extremely cool-looking.

Eric Schneider:

Julia, you made us-

Julia:

If I was high at Burning Man, that would be the coolest thing I've ever seen.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, Julia's just high making these slides. She's looking at Flaming Teeth.

Eric Silver:

Julia just likes fire.

Amanda:

Look at him. He's a giant with flaming teeth, come on.

Eric Schneider:

Should've seen that one coming.

Julia:

All right. I don't even care about how they [inaudible 00:37:32]. Now-

Amanda:

Don't hide anything. I'm serious [crosstalk 00:37:35]

Eric Silver:

That's the hard part.

Amanda:

My colleague-

Eric Silver:

You got to decide when she cares about the people.

Eric Schneider:

Exactly. That's the twist.

Amanda:

I want to be clear. We are against villages being terrorized. Thanks, Amanda.

Eric Silver:

We're against them being terrorized, but at the end of the day, we don't really care.

Amanda:

Fair enough.

Julia:

I want to be clear that it's not endorsed by the rest of us.

Eric Silver:

[crosstalk 00:37:55] we will if we can. Whatever. When we get to Super Tuesday, I don't want anyone to talk about how all the flaming teeth got there, America.

Amanda:

Let's move on. I hate this. Okay. Oops. Sorry. There was our boy. He did it heavily good, so far.

Julia:

That's true. That's true.

Amanda:

Damn. That sounds so good.

Julia:

All right. So we're now on the Gashadokuro. This is another giant Yokai.

Amanda:

What's up, pal?

Julia:

His name means "rattling skull." What did you say, Amanda?

Amanda:

Hey, buddy. What's up, pal?

Julia:

All right. So they wander the countryside in the darkest hours of the night. And if they find a human on the road, they will sneak up on them, and either crush them or bite their head off. They are born of soldiers who are not properly burned or victims of famine who are also not properly given burials when they pile up.

Eric Silver:

Wait. Real quick. Properly burned or properly buried?

Eric Schneider:

Given a proper funeral?

Julia:

Yeah. Usually, funerary rights. It didn't-

Eric Silver:

Okay. Got you.

Julia:

... involve that. When too many bones joined together, they formed this humongous skeletal monster. All right. One-

Eric Schneider:

And I want to be this thing so bad.

Eric Silver:

Yeah, this is you.

Eric Schneider:

This is me.

Eric Silver:

Okay.

Eric Schneider:

"Is it me," says Brandon.

Eric Silver:

I think we got to go cool bad.

Julia:

So that's the only argument there?

Eric Silver:

I won. I won.

Julia:

It looks cool, so ...

Eric Silver:

Brandon really likes it, he's clearly vibing with this guy. So I think we're going to quickly jump. We're going to exceed our two minutes.

Julia:

Be decisive.

Eric Silver:

Cool.

Julia:

I genuinely forgot what I wrote for this one, so go wild, gang.

Eric Silver:

And wait.

Amanda:

I think I'm going to say creepy because this is too many bones. Two, you got to be able to walk around alone at night. That sucks. Don't do that. And three. It's unfortunate, people don't get the burials that they expect in life.

Eric Schneider:

Genuine question. Do we think there's more than 206 bones in this thing or this is capped at 206?

Julia:

I think that there's many, many bones that then glom into the one bone [crosstalk 00:39:44].

Eric Silver:

God, I want to be this thing. So I'm going to add one point to the cool side, so we're sticking with cool. When I was growing up, I had a weird dinosaur, build your own dinosaur set.

Julia:

Yes, I remember these.

Eric Silver:

Do you remember these?

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

And you could just add so many bones. And the more bones you had, the cooler that weird dinosaur you would make. It's a different thing, and that thing never bit off a head or splash somebody on a road. But the idea is the same and also cool, so we're sticking with cool.

Eric Schneider:

Yes. Sorry, I just blacked out [inaudible 00:40:14] good story. I have a question about the thing on the left.

Julia:

Sure.

Eric Schneider:

So there's a photo. It's a picture, sorry. A picture rendering of the skeleton is looking in on a tower. And I don't like it because these are like, "Hey. You up?"

Julia:

[inaudible 00:40:30].

Eric Schneider:

I have a thousand bones together, stuck together my body. Is that good for you?

Amanda:

I just don't like the idea that a big grave becomes big bone monster. No. I just like the woman in the image on the right who's like reading something, and she's like, "What the fuck is this? What is going on over there."

Eric Silver:

It's a very similar idea. "Hey, you up?" "Hey, get out of my apartment."

Eric Schneider:

Are the people on the right picture dead or they just like worried?

Julia:

No. So the guy in the middle there is a samurai who's drawing his sword, and the other one is getting crushed.

Eric Schneider:

This is a game night. They're having a game night.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. This is a weird game of Twister with their big [crosstalk 00:41:13].

Eric Schneider:

100%. [Gusha Roogo 00:41:14].

Eric Silver:

I told you, Brandon, don't invite over big skeleton. He ruins my apartment every time. And he's kept some-

Julia:

And he always cheats at Monopoly.

Eric Silver:

And he steps on my roommate, and I have to find a new roommate.

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

And he takes all the Coke for himself.

Julia:

[crosstalk 00:41:30]

Amanda:

[crosstalk 00:41:30] with those Coke.

Eric Schneider:

Creepy. Definitely creepy.

Amanda:

Creepy.

Eric Schneider:

Cool. We're going cool.

Julia:

Are you guys cool?

Eric Schneider:

Pretty cool.

Julia:

All right.

Eric Schneider:

Julia does not remember which one this is, so I'm very [inaudible 00:41:37] to find out.

Julia:

I think I remember now.

Eric Schneider:

Okay.

Julia:

Yeah, I was [crosstalk 00:41:38].

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, let's go.

Julia:

It's hard to-

Eric Schneider:

I'm bad at this. I was bad-

Eric Silver:

[inaudible 00:41:43] the last time.

Eric Schneider:

It's me-

Julia:

You don't listen to the show?

Eric Silver:

Me and Julia have different ideas on what is cool.

Julia:

That's okay. All right. So nope. Nope, nope, nope, nope. Too sad.

Amanda:

Too many bones.

Julia:

Just way too sad. Too creepy. Too many bones.

Amanda:

Yes.

Julia:

All right. Next up, is a Farragut.

Amanda:

Are we sure that's not a Pokemon?

Julia:

If so, I need to catch it. I'm 25 away from completing my Pokedex. It's very important to me.

Eric Silver:

Holy shit.

Julia:

Thank you.

Amanda:

I'm so proud of you. I'm so, so proud.

Julia:

Got to catch them all! I will say it's probably not pronounced "fairy gut," but you'll see why I'm pronouncing it like that in a second. So this is a character from French and Italian epics. He was a giant paladin who was physically invulnerable, except for his stomach, ergo, gut. Just dumb pun, sorry, guys. The story is modeled after David and Goliath where Farragut is killed by the paladin Roland. Farragut reveals his vulnerability to Roland. He is [crosstalk 00:42:48] Roland.

Eric Silver:

You know the hero from mythology, Roland?

Julia:

He was a soldier Charlemagne, I believe. [crosstalk 00:42:57]

Eric Silver:

Still Roland. It sounds very-

Julia:

[crosstalk 00:42:57] in the table.

Eric Schneider:

[crosstalk 00:42:59]. It's very funny.

Julia:

Is this your new [Gervin 00:43:02]?

Eric Silver:

It's Gervin and Roland back at it again.

Julia:

Great. Farragut and Roland get into a battle that lasts for two days, and they just like, "Don't stop." And then after the second day, they've killed each other's horses, they're both extremely tired, they've broken a bunch of rocks and stuff. And so like, "Let me just take a break for a bit." And Roland gives Farragut a rock in which he could use as a pillow and as a thank you. Farragut's like, "Oh, hey. By the way, let's talk about Jesus and the Bible. And also, my invulnerability is everything but my stomach," and then Roland kills him.

Eric Schneider:

Eric, you were all with the youth pastor.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Where in the New Testament do you talk about how your stomach is not invulnerable?

Eric Silver:

Not part of it. Not a part of it.

Eric Schneider:

I just would know. I just wanted the [inaudible 00:43:53].

Eric Silver:

No, yeah.

Julia:

I don't like this.

Eric Silver:

I don't know this guy.

Julia:

These are just to-

Amanda:

I'm against war. I'm against needless property destruction. I'm against the fact that you're trying to have a moment of just solitude and then someone tries to evangelize you. Like, no, I'm in an airport. Don't do that. Don't like it.

Eric Schneider:

Eric, these are just two guys.

Eric Silver:

They're two guys.

Eric Schneider:

They're just two guys.

Eric Silver:

That's what I've been thinking about. I'm looking at the picture, I can't tell what's happening on the picture on the right. It's both farther away from me, and there's just a lot happening in it.

Eric Schneider:

Eric, that's not as good.

Eric Silver:

But the picture on the left is just one guy and then another guy-

Julia:

This is very challenging.

Eric Silver:

... and they both have swords and they're stabbing each other.

Julia:

But as you can see, he is tall on the right.

Eric Silver:

Also, I said picture. I didn't say photograph. Never mind. We're good.

Amanda:

No. It's not-

Eric Schneider:

[inaudible 00:44:40] I want to comment on this because I like that one is only a little bit larger than the other, and it's supposed to be a giant. This is on Tinder when it's just like, "Six feet taller or nothing." So it's like, "Oh, 5'8"? Fuck you." But he's not. Look, he's bending his knees. They're the same height.

Eric Silver:

[crosstalk 00:45:00]

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, exactly. It's like he's a giant because he gets all the ladies on a French Tinder.

Eric Silver:

It's also before we figured out perspective, so it's hard to just tell, like the legs are weird, the torso is weird.

Julia:

You're insulting the artwork of some poor monk who is probably drunk and has been living there since he was eight. Oh.

Eric Silver:

That's fine. I mean, he's dead probably. [crosstalk 00:45:20] He's probably a weird [inaudible 00:45:21] at this point.

Eric Schneider:

He should have been a shadow monk or a sea monk from the other [inaudible 00:45:26].

Julia:

Exactly.

Eric Schneider:

There's nothing creepier to me than actual people.

Eric Silver:

Yeah, that's true.

Eric Schneider:

So I'm going to go creepy.

Julia:

Okay.

Eric Silver:

And we're going creepy. What do you guys going?

Julia:

Creepy.

Eric Silver:

Yeah, Tinder guy is creepy.

Eric Schneider:

How do you pronounce Tinder in French?

Eric Silver:

[Le Tinder 00:45:39].

Amanda:

[Le Tinder 00:45:39].

Julia:

Creepy. Yeah.

Eric Silver:

It's just a weird die.

Julia:

All right. Cool. He doesn't act creepy, but come on, dude. You can't just tell people your one true weakness-

Amanda:

Exactly.

Julia:

... just because he gave you a pillow. He gave you a [inaudible 00:45:56] for a pillow.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Julia:

You don't deserve that.

Amanda:

No.

Julia:

It's dumb. All right.

Eric Silver:

Hey. It's another upside-down guy.

Amanda:

Julia.

Eric Silver:

It's another upside-down one.

Julia:

I didn't say you guys are going to have fun with a later one. This was that later one.

Speaker 5:

[inaudible 00:46:08].

Eric Silver:

I don't like that his-

Amanda:

I have to know about the clothing.

Eric Silver:

Can you go back to Roland?

Eric Schneider:

Freddie, did you just flip a box?

Eric Silver:

[inaudible 00:46:20]

Julia:

What is it?

Eric Silver:

I'm confused by gravity for his [inaudible 00:46:24].

Julia:

I just heard someone go, "What are these tits? Extremely big"

Eric Silver:

Yeah, his tits. His tits are being pulled away from Earth.

Julia:

Listen. All bodies are good bodies.

Eric Silver:

Guys, it's-

Eric Schneider:

No. It not a body issue we're thinking. It's a gravity issue.

Eric Silver:

No. This is what I'm going to say is-

Eric Schneider:

The gravity just doesn't go that way.

Eric Silver:

This is like in an anime or a video game like boob physics.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

It's like the boobs go on a different way than the rest of the body.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Julia:

They do.

Eric Silver:

Listen, go back and fix the polygons, please.

Eric Schneider:

Also, I don't think his knees are bending the right.

Eric Silver:

They're definitely not.

Eric Schneider:

Right?

Amanda:

Nothing's right about this. Yeah. Are his legs on backwards?

Julia:

No.

Eric Schneider:

I think if you unroll them and he bent them [crosstalk 00:47:06]. I think it does work. I think it works.

Julia:

This is the most controversial one, I feel like.

Eric Schneider:

My favorite thing about this image [inaudible 00:47:11] no one else in the image. He's just doing this for himself. Oh, wait. I've just noticed something. I've just noticed something important about the image. He's not using his hands to walk. They're just hanging.

Eric Silver:

No.

Eric Schneider:

He is climbing between two cliffs with his feet.

Eric Silver:

Yeah, that's not-

Julia:

This is important.

Amanda:

I notice that.

Eric Silver:

I thought he was flinging himself from the [seed dick 00:47:31] first.

Julia:

Would you guys like some context [crosstalk 00:47:35]?

Eric Schneider:

Sorry. We don't really [crosstalk 00:47:38]. No.

Eric Silver:

Let us go. And then don't even ... Just tell [inaudible 00:47:41].

Julia:

So keep going. [Crosstalk 00:47:42] I'll take my chair [crosstalk 00:47:44].

Eric Silver:

I don't know. I don't know. Do we want to go no context?

Julia:

Aren't you guys notice that his nipples have eyelashes?

Eric Silver:

No. No. Now, we're getting into body shaming. Now, I'm uncomfortable with it.

Julia:

There.

Eric Silver:

Listen, a hairy nipple is nothing to be ashamed of.

Eric Schneider:

Listen. And we noticed that-

Eric Silver:

In 1.1, they're going to fix those polygons. Take out the eyelashes. I want to go to a context, and if you want to tell us it later.

Julia:

Okay. So its name is [Tihar ie Oni 00:48:15]. That's all you're getting. You want no context?

Eric Silver:

No. No. No.

Julia:

All right, fine.

Eric Schneider:

I know that an [Oni 00:48:20] is like an ice monster, so that's something.

Julia:

[Oni 00:48:23] is a general term for demon or evil spirit.

Eric Silver:

I thought I knew something.

Eric Schneider:

You know a nice monster.

Eric Silver:

I thought I knew something.

Eric Schneider:

Close. So close.

Julia:

So his name means "Handwashing Demon."

Eric Schneider:

Oh. That's cool. I didn't even think it [crosstalk 00:48:34].

Julia:

So that's what he do. He's just trying to prevent the spread of disease.  So he is big enough to straddle mountains, and will do so in order to wash its hands in bodies of water without getting its feet wet.

Amanda:

Fuck yeah, guys.

Julia:

And it always washes its hands like that. Every image is exactly like that.

Eric Silver:

I thought you meant that it wash other people's hands.

Julia:

No. It's watching its own hands. Fuck yeah, that's cool. Wash your hands, folks. Get your flu shot.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. I think it's cool as well. I think that you should wash your hands. Great. I just did it before I came here down here. And-

Julia:

Proud of you. Be like me.

Eric Silver:

Yeah. I like that he gets around the mountains in a cool way. He does look like he was in one of those cells on a Scooby-Doo cartoon, where everything else was-

Eric Schneider:

Oh, my God, he does.

Eric Silver:

... drawn. And then he's the thing moving through it, but it's a still image. Like you know how on Scooby-Doo you could be like, "Oh, that's the floor board," where the things are going to be under because it was drawn a little different. That's how this guy looks in the drawing. I think he's cool.

Julia:

What the fuck are you doing watching Scooby-Doo, Eric?

Eric Silver:

I love that all we were doing, you know, ripping 14th Century artists.

Julia:

Probably earlier that that, to be honest.

Amanda:

Listen, I think it's great. He's rocking his body. He has no shame. Why should we? That's great.

Eric Silver:

If we both landed on cool, it's practically a no contest, so let's just find out.

Eric Schneider:

I was not thinking this was going to end up cool when we started with this.

Amanda:

We came around.

Julia:

Listen.

Eric Silver:

Oh, you know the guy who led Dick first and has eyelash boobs? Yeah, [Nido 00:50:01] man.

Eric Schneider:

I just want to be able to be on the side of, "Handwashing? Great. Cool. Do it."

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Yes.

Eric Schneider:

This guy ... No. [inaudible 00:50:09]

Eric Silver:

Okay.

Julia:

Looks can be deceiving, guys.

Amanda:

It's true.

Julia:

We're-

Eric Silver:

Me and Amanda, we searched these.

Eric Schneider:

We're so cool. [crosstalk 00:50:15]. Me and Amanda have [joyed 00:50:16] cool. And Eric invited [inaudible 00:50:18].

Eric Silver:

I'm more just long for the ride, y'all.

Eric Schneider:

You've got me, too.

Julia:

All right. So the answer is cool.

Amanda:

Yes.

Eric Schneider:

Yes, of course.

Eric Silver:

Oh, yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Of course.

Julia:

Just trying to be clean.

Eric Schneider:

Exactly.

Amanda:

Yeah. Cleanliness is next to godliness. Sure.

Julia:

I think.

Amanda:

And we all get in weird positions to shave our legs in the shower, whatever, so I don't judge.

Julia:

It's very true.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah.

Julia:

It's very true.

Eric Silver:

Well ...

Julia:

All right. So that was points for both teams there. Yay.

Eric Schneider:

What I like about the cool, and I think it was just the font, but it looks like they are little eyeglasses. Just a fun thing I wanted to share with all of you, intimate time together.

Julia:

All right, gang, we are onto our final level of Crazy or Cool. The current score is Team Only Good Relationship in Greek and Roman Mythology is at seven, and then Team Banana Ghost is at four.

Eric Silver:

Good.

Julia:

Not doing great.

Eric Silver:

Real quick. Family Feud rules? Triple points.

Eric Schneider:

Yes. So this one is worth four, right?

Julia:

Yes. This one is worth four.

Eric Silver:

We could end in a tie.

Eric Schneider:

Okay. That's fine. Another one [inaudible 00:51:25].

Julia:

All right. This one is worth three points for some reason now. Let's do it.

Eric Silver:

It's not. It's not.

Eric Schneider:

For the stakes.

Julia:

So this is a [quafu 00:51:32]. What a noble friend.

Eric Schneider:

Eric, look at those eyes.

Eric Silver:

They're good. They're good eyes. Also the mustache.

Julia:

Everybody-

Eric Schneider:

The mustache.

Eric Silver:

The mustache is so good.

Julia:

I'd say every man on my flight to Austin was inexplicably ripped. And I was like, "Is everyone in Austin ripped?" So I have some work to do before we get here. So [quafu 00:51:53] was a giant from Chinese Mythology who is the grandson of the deity of the deep earth. That's a fun title.

Amanda:

Wow.

Julia:

I love that. He decided one day he wanted to catch the sun. So he followed the sun from east to west. As he got thirsty in his chase, he drained both the Yellow and the Wei rivers. He overexerted himself, and even the rivers didn't stop him from dying of dehydration.

Amanda:

No.

Julia:

And then his club became a forest of peach trees and his body became a mountain range.

Eric Silver:

I don't know. This guy seems like secretly he's a fuckboy.

Amanda:

I think Julia is going to say creepy, and then got to hydrate as the first bullet.

Eric Schneider:

But you haven't think about it. The sun, I'm sure, was doing fine before. It was going left. It was going east to west like it does. And it's like, "I want to fix that." And then he's like, "I have my Tom Selleck mustache and 12-pack. I'm going to go deal with it." So then he goes, and then he drinks everyone's water from all the rivers, which is a big deal, with rivers. Water, big deal. And then he's like, "Mmm ... I biffed it, anyway." And then he just died. And then he's rewarded, anyway. He's like, "Oh, good job for trying, giant man. Here's a peach tree in your name." I don't know. He seems like a fuck boy.

Julia:

Yeah. I think it's good to start forests and stuff. I also am loving the red leopard print with a blue sword belt.

Amanda:

It's very Flintstone-y.

Eric Schneider:

I was going to say he looks like a buff Fred Flintstone.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Which I don't know if that's good or bad yet. I haven't decided.

Julia:

Who's [crosstalk 00:53:23].

Eric Schneider:

I have his bed. Okay.

Julia:

I'm going to go creepy, because he got to hydrate. And don't mess with the sun.

Eric Schneider:

This feels like a real [Zeus 00:53:29] situation. Like he's written about a lot, but he's a bad dude.

Julia:

Okay.

Eric Schneider:

Definitely.

Eric Silver:

So we need to go cool in order to get the fake three bonus points to tie it. So let's come up with some creative reasons this could possibly be cool-

Julia:

Let's mitigate this situation real quick. 

Eric Silver:

... just to make it interesting.

Eric Schneider:

Okay. Mustaches.

Eric Silver:

Mustache to it.

Eric Schneider:

Very cool.

Eric Silver:

Fred Flintstone after it.

Eric Schneider:

Very cool.

Julia:

I'm assuming the mustache-beard combo-

Eric Silver:

Great thighs.

Julia:

... is very, very good.

Eric Schneider:

Great thighs.

Julia:

I feel like a good anime character if we have that combo.

Eric Schneider:

Great thighs.

Eric Silver:

I have a question. There's a bird standing on the sun in the second picture.

Julia:

Yeah, that's the sun.

Eric Silver:

The sun is just like, "I'm a bird, too."

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Cool.

Amanda:

Marathon's cool.

Eric Silver:

Marathon's cool. Marathons? I don't know. I'm not convinced about marathons. People love doing marathons, but here's the thing about Marathons. The first guy that did it died.

Eric Schneider:

What?

Julia:

And it's true.

Eric Silver:

He ran from Athens to Rome or one of those two places. It's not Athens [crosstalk 00:54:24].

Julia:

The marathon.

Eric Silver:

Thank you. Athens.

Eric Schneider:

Just ask the Spirit listeners. They know.

Eric Silver:

Athens for marathon.

Julia:

Twice on a marathon.

Eric Silver:

He got there. He's like, "War is coming," and then he died. Marathons, why people run in those? That's not important right now.

Julia:

Chasing your dreams is cool.

Eric Silver:

Chasing your dreams is cool.

Julia:

Taking the sun down isn't cool.

Eric Silver:

But imagine if you took down the sun.

Eric Schneider:

Sun burn is bad.

Eric Silver:

Sun burn is bad. He's trying to prevent cancer.

Julia:

Sun burn is awesome.

Eric Silver:

Cancer prevention.

Eric Schneider:

We found it. We found it.

Eric Silver:

Cancer prevention. We're going cool.

Eric Schneider:

Yeah, cool.

Eric Silver:

We're going cool. That's final answer.

Julia:

I would say he didn't have a plan for what he was going to do with the sun. He's like, "I want to do it."

Eric Silver:

It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter.

Julia:

Are you sure?

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Julia:

All right, so we are deciding. So team creepy on the end there, team cool over here.

Eric Silver:

Yep.

Amanda:

All right.

Eric Schneider:

Damn.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Amanda:

Creepy.

Julia:

I appreciate my colleagues letting me win on the eve of my birthday. It's very nice of you all. Good pandering about the...

Eric Silver:

Our listeners are so on point because they cheered for when you had an almost full Pokedex.

Julia:

And also your birthday.

Eric Silver:

And also for almost being your birthday. They're good people.

Julia:

Thank you.

Amanda:

All right.

Julia:

They are.

Amanda:

So reasons behind it. So now, obviously, creepy but uncool, I think is a good-

Eric Silver:

Very fair.

Julia:

So comparable to the story of Icarus, [Qua-foo 00:55:38] dies from dehydration after trying to change down the sun. His name and story are used to describe a person who fails to obtain his goal because-

Amanda:

Fuck yeah.

Julia:

... he completely overestimates himself.

Amanda:

Love that. Yeah.

Julia:

So it's like, accept your limitations. Be chill.

Eric Schneider:

Well, I just don't understand.

Amanda:

Chill, bro.

Eric Schneider:

He got rewarded at the end by having the peach tree grow.

Amanda:

No. That's just like ... It wasn't a reward. It was just like you leave a thing there and something grew out of it.

Eric Schneider:

Okay.

Eric Silver:

His stick just became a peach tree and he became a mountain.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

It's a very neutral thing-

Amanda:

Yes.

Eric Silver:

... at the end. Right?

Amanda:

Peaches are nice, but also, it's not like an award for him.

Julia:

He doesn't gets like enjoying being a peach tree.

Amanda:

Yes.

Julia:

[crosstalk 00:56:14]

Eric Schneider:

I think this is a great life lesson to end on.

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Eric Schneider:

Listen, if only this guy had died and turned into a giant skeleton and he plays the drums forever.

Amanda:

Then it would be super cool. I don't know.

Julia:

That would have been very cool.

Amanda:

So cool.

Julia:

Yeah, but accept your limitations. That's it. Great sober note to end our Creepy or Cool. Thank you guys for joining us. The team Amanda over there, Team Best Relationship in Greek and Roman Mythology.

Amanda:

Yes.

Julia:

That's part of what they say. They're all winners. Incredible. They won with 10 points, which I honestly did not think was possible. But also, all we can do was three points. The end. So it went pretty good.

Eric Schneider:

Eight correct. I think I'm getting better at this.

Julia:

Yeah. And Team Banana goes. You did great, guys.

Eric Silver:

Thank you.

Julia:

Proud of you.

Eric Silver:

Thank you.

Julia:

So thank you for joining us. I think we're going to wrap it up. Yeah.

Amanda:

Yeah.

Julia:

Yeah. What's up?

Eric Schneider:

There is more merch. If you would like it, have another drink. Tip your bartenders well. Thank you to the North Door for having us. It's been a blast.

Julia:

Yeah.

Eric Silver:

Yeah.

Julia:

And we're going to be hanging out here for a bit after we break down the stage and what not.

Amanda:

We're going to be hanging out, so hangout with us.

Julia:

Yeah.

Amanda:

But we have to end the thing that we end on.

Julia:

Okay.

Amanda:

Which is, remember everybody, stay creepy and stay cool.

Eric Silver:

Be a skeleton.